Safe
by SongofJoy
Summary: One word. Many meanings.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own the show or the characters or, sadly, the actors.**

**A/N: I have, clearly, lost my mind to start another story.**

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><p>"Wow."<p>

Detective Kate Beckett gingerly sidestepped the debris that surrounded their latest victim – trash, papers, a pool of blood – to survey the body itself. "Someone did _not_ like this guy."

Lanie Parrish glanced up at her friend with a grim smile. "Yeah, no kidding." She gestured toward the visible injuries. "Multiple stab wounds from head to toe. Gunshot wounds to the abdomen. And, if that weren't enough to kill him, his throat was slit pre-mortem."

"How can you tell?" Kate squatted near the victim's shoulder and peered at the deep gash across his neck. She winced; it looked like his head had practically been severed from the force of the assault.

"By the quantity and pattern of the blood spatter," Lanie cocked her head in the direction of the opposite wall. "I'll know for sure after an autopsy, but this is my guess as to what killed him."

"Geez," the voice boomed from behind her. "Can we say _overkill_?"

Kate blinked an eye roll and couldn't stop a wry grin. "Castle. I wondered if you were joining us today."

He shot her a comical grimace, holding out his hand to help her stand to her feet. "Yeah, sorry about that. I was in the shower when you called. And then I got … distracted … and didn't check the messages until about half an hour ago."

She wondered what sort of distractions he'd encountered – if they were of the female variety. Her jaw clenched almost imperceptibly.

"Don't sweat it," she tried to brush off the jealous twinges that tugged at her heart. He arched an eyebrow, and she got the impression that he wasn't buying her nonchalance.

Before he could say anything, Esposito appeared at her side, his notebook flipped open. "Our vic is John Brennan – 56 year old Caucasian male, investment banker, divorced, no children."

"Is this his house?" Kate twisted her neck to scan their surroundings.

Esposito nodded. "Yes. His housekeeper – she's downstairs with Ryan – says that he's lived here for the past 5 years, ever since he separated from his ex."

"And the safe?"

"Vault."

Kate stared at Castle for the interruption, but he went on, hesitantly undeterred.

"Technically, it's really more of a vault. Floor to ceiling, bank model… but we can call it a safe. It's fine." He hurried through the last phrase, drawing a reluctant smile and head shake from Kate.

"And the _vault_?" she asked again.

Esposito wiped the smirk off his face at her glare and consulted his notes. "Yep. Housekeeper says he keeps some money, some bonds, some jewelry that belonged to his mother, even some gold bouillon in there."

"Well, it's not in there anymore."

"No," Castle agreed, standing behind her to peer over her shoulder into the empty hole in the wall. "It certainly is not."

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><p>"So… those must have been some distractions this morning," Kate teased casually (at least she hoped that's how it sounded) as they left the crime scene and headed for her car.<p>

When he looked at her curiously, she explained, "Not only were you late to a body drop, I don't see my coffee."

He leaned against the passenger door, arms crossed, lips pursed, knowing gleam in his eyes. "Well, well, well, Detective. Are you… jealous?"

"Hah!" She felt herself blushing in spite of her denial, a smile tugging at her face. "You'd like that, wouldn't you, Castle? For me to be jealous of your latest conquest."

Heading around to the driver side of the car, she couldn't stop herself from adding, "Although, if I were the type to get jealous of how my partner spends his time, I would probably also be the type to point out that, clearly, I was the last thing on your mind this morning."

_As __if_. He nearly laughed out loud at the thought, then thought better of it, turning instead to look at her over the top of her car.

"I don't suppose Serena Kaye finally agreed to go out with you last night?" For some reason, she could not shut up. Staring at his shell-shocked face, she just kept talking. "Maybe she stayed over… you decided to save water by sharing the shower, then headed back to bed…bada bing, bada boom."

He raised his hand to cut her off, then did a double take, and asked with sardonic amusement, "Did you just say '_bada __bing, __bada __boom__'_, Beckett?"

Averting her eyes, she shrugged her shoulders. "Maybe."

She opened her door stiffly and slid behind the wheel, forcing Castle to duck his head to catch her eye. When the engine sprang to life, he quickly opened his own door and followed her in, placing his hand over hers before she could switch from 'Park' to 'Drive'.

"Detective." His low voice felt like an intimate caress, and Kate fought against the shiver that rocked her from temple to spine. "Kate."

Her eyes darted to his, and her breath caught as he held her gaze. "I got distracted by an impromptu game of laser tag with Alexis. I didn't have anyone over last night. And, on the very remote chance that I did, it would _not_ be Serena Kaye."

"Why not, Castle?" Why in heaven's name could she not quit talking? _Seriously, __Kate. __Shut __up!_ "You can't tell me you didn't like that game of tonsil hockey you two were playing."

Despite the fact that her vocal chords were determined to ignore the cries to be silent coming from her brain, she was proud of herself for keeping her tone light.

"Kate. I'm a guy. There are two things we can't resist."

"Only two?"

"Well… possibly more than two. But for the purposes of this discussion…" He counted off the short list with his fingers. "Boobs. And a woman with boobs who is willing to play tonsil hockey with us."

Kate fought the urge to glance critically at her own chest, settling instead for crossing her arms and trying to appear unaffected by his admission.

"But," he was saying, "I didn't enjoy it as much as you are afraid I did."

"Afraid?" She shifted indignantly in her seat to glare at him. "What do you mean by that?"

He shrugged. "I'm just saying … Serena made it very clear to me that she thought I was unavailable."

Kate's eyes narrowed with suspicion. "Why did she think you… ?"

"I don't know, Kate. I thought you knew." He grinned disarmingly at her, loving the way her lips parted in surprise. "You two were talking, I came up, you left. She told me that she would ask me to her hotel room, except…"

His voice trailed off for dramatic effect, bristling Kate's irritation with this whole line of discussion. When he continued, his voice had lowered several octaves. "Except she said that she didn't take things that belong to someone else."

"Well, I don't know what she meant by that," Kate huffed, twisting back to face the road and putting the car smoothly into 'drive'.

"That's okay," Castle smirked. "I do."

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><p><strong>See that little review link just down there? I'd love for you to click it and let me know how insane you think I am for starting another story... or something you liked about this chapter, either one lol.<strong>


	2. Chapter 2

"Okay. So." Much later that day, when the evening sky was turning dusky, Kate tapped her pen against her chin and stared at their latest murder board. "Where are we with this?"

"Not much farther along than we were this time yesterday," Esposito informed her grimly.

She blinked at him. "This time yesterday, Mr. Brennan was most likely still alive."

"Exactly," he quipped.

"Well, what _do_ we have?" Kate sighed with frustration, accepting a cup of steaming coffee from Castle with a weary smile of gratitude.

"Other than robbery, we're still looking for a motive."

"Yeah… from the look of the crime scene, I get the feeling that robbing the safe was a secondary thing – maybe an afterthought? There was too much anger in that killing for him to have just surprised the thieves."

Kate nodded at Rick's observation. "Any word on the ex-wife's whereabouts?"

Esposito stuck a picture of a blond woman on the murder board under the 'Suspects' heading. "I really think we can rule her out – she's been in some sort of spa in Europe for the past month."

Kate cocked an eyebrow. "Must be nice."

The other detective smirked. "I get the feeling that 'spa' is a code word for 'rehab'. But wherever she is, there's no way to contact her. I talked to her sister, and she said she'll let us know when she hears from her."

"Did we check her passport just in case she snuck back into the country without letting anyone know?"

"Yeah - no activity."

"Have we notified Brennan's next of kin yet?"

"Well…" Esposito grimaced uncomfortably.

"What's the hold-up?"

Ryan appeared over Esposito's shoulder in time to hear the latest discussion. "It's a little prickly."

She turned her gaze to him and narrowed her eyes in confusion. "How so?"

"Well, you know he's divorced. No children. Turns out he's an only child, too. His mother is his only living relative."

"She's in a nursing home in Queens," Esposito piped in. "With Alzheimer's."

"How bad?" Rick asked.

"From what we could gather after talking to the home's director, she's in and out of reality."

Kate sighed, her breath heavy with impatience, and hopped off her desk. Turning, she grabbed her bag and her jacket. "Okay. Castle and I will head over there first thing in the morning. We'll talk to the director and see how harmful it would be for us to tell her about her son. If the Alzheimer's is really that bad, it might be better just to leave well enough alone."

Rick followed her toward the elevator and stood closer than she thought was necessary as the doors closed behind them. He leaned in, the puffs of air when he spoke tickling the wisps of hair that had come out of her braid.

"Since I committed the unpardonable sin of neglecting to bring you coffee this morning, can I buy you dinner?"

A smile twitched at Kate's lips, and she shifted slightly to put some additional space between them. "I don't know, Castle. I'm pretty tired."

"Come on…" he whined. "Mother has a rehearsal. Alexis is at a party. You know how I hate to eat alone."

"Ah, so this is about _you_," Kate teased, shaking her head as the doors dinged open on the ground floor. He hurried after her, catching up to her with a hand at her elbow.

"No… C'mon, Kate. We can pick up some Chinese food – take it back to my place – have a little impromptu movie night." Nudging her conspiratorially he added, "I'll even let you pick the movie."

She hesitated, but the smile on her face told him she would acquiesce any minute now. "Fine," she relented, true to form, readjusting the strap of her bag when it slipped from her shoulder.

He nearly bounced into the car, his excitement tangible, and Kate knew a moment's doubt that she'd made the right decision. "You know," he was saying, "since we're going out to Queens first thing in the morning, you _could_ just stay over – in my guest room of course."

Eyes narrowing, she could tell he had more ideas up his sleeve and silently dared him to continue. "Um…" he stammered a bit at the look in her eyes and honestly meant to shut up on the spot, but with horror he heard himself keep talking. "And maybe we could do that whole 'save water – share the shower' thing you were talking about this morning."

"Castle."

"Yeah?"

"You're pressing your luck."

"Got it."

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><p>"Hey – I thought I got to pick the movie!"<p>

Rick stopped, the remote in mid-air, and looked to Kate with a bemused smirk. "I'm sorry. I didn't think turning on the TV equated with strong-arming you into a certain movie choice."

Giving a sweeping gesture toward the screen, he sat back and clasped his hands behind his head. "Choose away."

She shot him a quick grin and perused the DVD selections thoughtfully. He continued to sit on the couch, his eyes closed, but he stole the occasional peek at her shapely form when he thought the coast was clear.

"Stop staring at my butt, Castle." Even as she chided him, her skin tingled the way it had when he'd grabbed her rear end and not her legs, the night they were exploring the not-so-haunted haunted house. Good lord, what would happen to her if he ever touched her there – without the barrier of clothing to muffle the sensation?

"How do you _do_ that?" He stared at her, flabbergasted. "Do cops have eyes in the back of their heads, too? I thought that was just teachers."

Biting her lip to hide her smile, Kate picked a DVD and pushed the eject button on the player. She laughed at the disc that was still in the machine and held it up with a questioning arch of her eyebrow. "Zombies, Castle? Really?"

He sat up indignantly. "Father-daughter movie night, thank you very much. Alexis' choice."

"Why am I not surprised?" Kate murmured teasingly. "The little Castle doesn't fall far from the… big … from the father Castle."

Rick noted her stumbling of words and redirection with a pursing of his lips but chose to let it go for now. "So… what's it going to be, Detective?" He peered at the case she held in her hands. "The Matt Damon flick – good choice, by the way – or the flesh-eating zombies?"

She debated a moment. "Well, I was 100% going to go with the Matt Damon one because I haven't seen it yet. But… I think it's going to have to be the flesh-eating zombies."

His grin could have powered all the electricity in New York, if they ever low on wattage. "_Excellent_ choice, Detective."

When she'd returned it to the player and found a seat next to him, curling her legs beneath her, he touched her foot and whispered, "You know – feel free to jump into my lap and seek comfort in my arms if you get scared."

"Castle."

"Yeah?"

"You're pressing your luck again."

"Got it."


	3. Chapter 3

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!"

The melody of Kate's uncontrollable laughter mingled with the cacophony of Rick's girlish scream, and she tried unsuccessfully to catch her breath. She wasn't laughing at the movie as much as she was laughing at Rick's antics. The little boy deep within was out in full force tonight. That, and the wine. She'd lost count of how much she'd had so far – not enough to be too much but enough to give her a relaxing buzz and lower her usual inhibitions.

The zombie struck again on the large screen, but this time Kate's laughter was stolen from her throat as a cold hand from beneath the couch grabbed her ankle. And this time, it was her scream that tore through the apartment. She launched herself into Rick's lap, skittering her feet across the couch and staring blankly at the familiar red head that popped over the cushions to grace her with a teasing grin.

Both Castles cackled in amusement as Kate waded through the wine haze to figure out what had just happened. "Alexis?" she breathed, a hand over her heart, a chuckle gradually bubbling up from her chest. "When did you get in?"

"Just now." Alexis pushed herself to a standing position and came around to plop down in the seat that had been Kate's on the couch. "You guys had the volume up so loud that I knew you didn't hear me." She grinned impishly, favoring her father. "I couldn't resist."

"As much as I _love_ your sense of timing and spontaneity, it's probably not a good idea to scare the cop with the gun," Rick chided around his own soft laughter.

Suddenly realizing that she still sat on his lap, Kate tried to untangle herself but it was to no avail as the hands at her hips tightened to keep her in place. She turned an incredulous and meaningful glare at the man who held her captive, but his cheeks simply dimpled with delight. "It's also not a good idea to hold the _detective_ with the gun against her will," she pointed out, wishing someone could turn off the fiery red blush that she could feel warming her cheeks.

"Kate."

"Yeah?"

"I'm pressing my luck again, aren't I?"

When she simply raised her eyebrows and gave him 'that look', he squeezed her hips a final time and released her reluctantly. "Got it."

She grinned in spite of herself and moved to the nearby overstuffed chair. "How was the party?"

Alexis rolled her eyes. "Kinda lame. That's why I'm home before midnight." She inclined her face toward her dad. "If I'd known Kate was here, I would have totally skipped out sooner."

'There's some leftover Chinese food in the kitchen," Kate told her.

As his daughter's eyes lit up hungrily, Rick reached up with the remote and stopped the movie, watching her with fondness as she scampered to see what they'd ordered.

"She's a great kid, Rick," Kate murmured.

Their eyes met, and he smiled. "Yeah, I think I'll keep her." Then, he sobered a bit and added, "I'm still worried about her and Ashley though."

"Castle, I told you not to worry about her. She holds the power in the relationship." Kate kept her voice low to avoid being overheard by the redhead.

"Yeah, but I don't know that _she_ knows that," Rick argued.

Kate shrugged in sympathy. "She'll figure it out. Just like we did."

When he started in surprise, she replayed her words in her head, a horrified look crossing her face as the implication hit her. "I mean, like we did – separately – in our own first relationships – _separate_ relationships."

Chuckling under her breath at her own bumbling attempt at an explanation – or a denial, she wasn't sure which she was going for – Kate rubbed her hands across her eyes and sighed. "I think I've had too much to drink."

"Then you should stay here tonight," Alexis chimed in around bites of lo mein as she returned from the kitchen.

"Sure," Rick agreed readily. "In the guest room, of course. Separately. In our own rooms – _separate _rooms."

Kate pursed her lips at his jesting and paused to consider her options. On the one hand, with as much wine as she'd had, it was probably best not to drive home. On the other hand, with as much wine as she'd had, it would be playing with fire to stay in such close proximity to the man who had been monopolizing her dreams more and more frequently. She wasn't even sure at this point which option was more dangerous.

Both pairs of Castle eyes watched her expectantly, and Kate found their united power impossible to resist. "Okay," she relented. Focusing solely on Alexis, she asked, "Do you have something I could borrow to sleep in?"

"I've got just the thing!"

She hurried upstairs to her room, intent on her mission, and Rick couldn't stop himself from teasing Kate with a low rumble in his voice. "So… we might get to test out that water conservation method you suggested this morning after all."

"In your dreams, Castle. Besides, that wasn't a suggestion. It was a theory."

She stood to her feet, a little wobbly from the alcohol, and started gathering their empty glasses to take them to the sink for rinsing. As she reached for Rick's glass, her balance betrayed her and sent her sprawling onto the writer's lap for the second time that evening.

One look at his face made her insides turn over. He was positively beaming, emotions she didn't want to deal with shining in his gaze. "Best. Movie night. Ever."

"Don't let it go to your head," Kate warned as she braced her hands against his knees and shoved herself upright once again.

"That wasn't where it was going," he assured her mischievously, and she felt her face flame again.

"It's the wine," she blurted inanely.

"If that makes you feel better," he parried.

She glanced toward the stairs, willing Alexis to reappear with her nightclothes, but the teenager was still nowhere to be found.

"I don't suppose Alexis forgot about me?"

Rick smothered a laugh with his hand, but his eyes twinkled as he looked at her. "If she did, it was on purpose," he replied cryptically. "I'll go find her."

But when he came back downstairs, the flirtation in his smile hadn't dimmed one iota and he carried no clothes – and no Alexis – with him. "She's in the shower," he explained, trying but failing to sound apologetic. "And I don't know how which clothes she wanted you to have."

Kate merely gaped at him, and his next words spilled hurriedly from his lips. "I'll just grab some of my clothes for you to wear." He tried to shrug nonchalantly and opened his mouth, but she cut him off by covering it with her palm.

"Don't say it, Castle," she warned.

"Don't say what?" he asked, his voice muffled around the heat of her hand.

"Whatever you were about to say along the lines of 'Or you could just sleep naked, Beckett'. Don't say that."

"I wasn't going to say that," he retorted indignantly and she eased her hand away cautiously. "I was _going_ to say 'Or you could just sleep naked, _Kate_.' That kind of thing requires more familiarity."

"Clothes, Castle. Now."

"Right. Clothes. On it."

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><p><strong>Reviews feed my fuzzy muse ... (hint hint)<strong>


	4. Chapter 4

"Dad?"

The whispered voice startled Rick from a deep slumber, and he sat up in bed, disoriented and disheveled.

"Dad? It's just me…"

"What's wrong? Are you sick?" He cleared his throat and forced himself to wake up enough to process what Alexis was saying.

"No – I came downstairs to get a drink of water. I can hear Kate moaning and crying in her sleep, Dad. I think she's having a nightmare."

He was awake now. Throwing the covers free, he swung his legs over the side of the bed and followed Alexis to the door of the guest room. She was right – it sounded as though Kate was completely engulfed in a dream from which she couldn't break away.

"What should we do?" he asked his daughter in a hushed voice, thick with sleep.

Alexis shrugged, her eyes slightly panicked. "I don't know. One of us should go in there, I suppose. Try and wake her up."

"Which one should it be?"

"Well… I'm another woman so she might be more comfortable with me seeing her in whatever clothes you dug up for her."

"Yeah … about that, Miss 'I've got just the thing'," Castle's lips had puckered on the brink of a mild chastisement when another whimpered moan from Kate's room stole his heart from his chest.

"On the other hand," Alexis went on, taking in the look on her dad's face with an understanding beyond her years. "She knows you better. Plus, even if I went in there, you'd be hovering at the door."

"True. I do hover."

He placed his hand on the door, still hesitating to push it open as he debated how much trouble he'd be in for being the one to wake her up. Another cry sounded, this one calling his name, and the decision was made for him. Without another thought, he slipped inside the room and cautiously approached the bed. Just because she knew him better didn't mean she still wouldn't shoot him – especially if she was still in that place between dream-world and reality.

Sliding beneath the covers, he caught her flailing body in a tight embrace, keeping her arms pinned to her sides. "Ssh, Kate, it's just a dream. Wake up, sweetheart. You're safe. I'm here."

"Rick…" She was still asleep, still held hostage by her nightmare, and her forehead scrunched in a mixture of fear and pain. "Rick, no… Roy… let me go. Let me go. No!"

And then she was sobbing in her sleep, in his arms, all fight draining from her body as tears flooded her face. He held her against his chest, brushing his hand down her hair, trailing his fingers along her spine, whispering soothing words of comfort against her temple. "It's okay, Kate. I'm here. I'm here."

Alexis moved from her spot in the doorway to head back upstairs, feeling as though she were intruding on an intensely private moment between her dad and the woman he loved. Kate would be fine, she knew; she had the best nightmare-comforter anyone could ask for – something Alexis had experienced firsthand. There was something about her father's hugs that made Alexis feel like everything would be right with the world – even if it was a horrible impossibility.

Rick could tell when Kate began to wake and kept his caresses steady and reassuring. Her sobs faded into hiccups of emotion, and her breathing gradually became less ragged. His lungs constricted when she snuggled into his embrace rather than pulling away – something that in turn surprised and elated him.

"How often do you have these nightmares?" he murmured into the darkness.

She shuddered in response, and he nodded against her hair, pressing a light kiss to the silken tresses. "Too often, huh?"

"It's – always – the – same," Kate forced out, her voice trembling and raw.

"The night Montgomery died?"

Shaking her head, she raised her hand to glide across his shoulder, coming to rest over his heart. "Not really. I mean … it's that night but …"

He could feel the tension return and wove his fingers through her hair, letting the locks cascade over his palm and gently massaging her scalp. When she began to relax again, he slowed his pace but maintained the tactile connection. He'd wait until she was ready to talk about it – at least until she wasn't so exhausted.

Her breathing evened out after a few moments, and he could tell she had fallen asleep. Waiting until he was sure she was resting deeply, he shifted their bodies to allow him to find a more reclining position, his arms still holding her against his heart. Her hand rose in her sleep to cradle his face, and he turned his lips to caress her palm with a gentle kiss.

"Rick," she sighed, but this time it was peaceful and contented. His heart felt like it would burst out of his body if given the opportunity, and a lump grew in his throat as protectiveness and love battled for dominance. It wasn't often that he got to see her vulnerable like this – though it had happened more frequently over the past year or so. And the fact that she trusted him enough to lean on him in her moments of fragility made him feel strong enough to crush a mountain with his bare hands.

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><p>Sunlight filtered lazily through the window of the guest room, coaxing Rick into wakefulness and waiting for him to acclimate to the unusual setting. He was still in bed with Kate, she was still in his arms, but over the course of the night she had flung a slender leg over his and the hand that had been at his cheek now lay across his abdomen. He could tell by her breathing that she was awake, and he began tracing the outline of her spine with a light touch, giving her the space she needed to process the intimacy of their positions.<p>

"You're in Roy's place," she finally whispered.

His hand stilled, and he shifted a bit so he could gaze into her red-rimmed eyes in confusion. "What do you mean?"

"You … you're the one sacrificing your life for me," she wept, her face crumpling against the strong emotions that pummeled her spirit. "Roy pulls me away, takes me outside the hangar. Everything _he_ did that night – is you in my dream. _You_ died."

"I didn't have anything to do with your mother's death, did I?" he asked, concerned. "In the dream."

"No." She shook her head, her hair tickling his neck and putting his senses into overdrive. "In my dream, the hangar – you're just protecting me from the people who killed her."

He thought of his murder board, the one on his computer, the one about her mother's case. A thought crossed his mind, making his heart swell with male pride. On one level – maybe just subconsciously – she knew that he would do anything in his power to protect her from harm.

"Have you talked to anyone about this?"

This time, she nodded. "Yeah. The shrink from my psych review – after the shooting. I've been seeing him since then – to help me work through some stuff."

"That's good," he told her, rubbing his hand along her upper arm. "A lot happened."

Then, "What does he think about your dream?"

"He says it's because I heard you say—" Kate's answer had begun as an automatic reflex, brought on by sleep deprivation and the vestiges of the nightmare, but she cut herself off abruptly and attempted to pull out of Rick's embrace, his spine stiffening at her words.

She tried to salvage the conversation – "I mean…" – but she cursed out loud as she realized there was no redemption after the words that had slipped past her defenses.

"Because you heard me say what?"

His voice was slow, almost cold in its delivery as though he were trying to distance himself emotionally from her answer.

"Castle… please, understand." She extricated herself from his light hold and sat up on her knees, taking one of his hands in hers and silently pleading with him to forgive her. "I … I couldn't deal with what you said to me in the cemetery."

"What did I say, Kate?" He sat up too but didn't disengage his hand.

She wanted to sob at the frostiness in his words, but forced herself to continue, hoping she could persuade him to see things from her perspective. "You said that you love me, Rick."

He held her gaze for a millisecond before averting his eyes and setting his jaw. "And your answer to that was to send me away for three months? Thanks, Kate."

When he tried to pull his hand from her grasp, she tightened her hold and tugged him back to her. "Rick, no. Don't do this, please. Put yourself in my shoes. Everything I'd ever believed in had been turned upside down. I needed a constant. I needed things between us to stay the same."

Relief washed over her when he laced his fingers through hers, though he kept his eyes trained on the opposite wall. "And now?"

His question was so soft she almost missed it, and her throat ached painfully as emotion clogged it. "I don't know," she admitted. "Part of me wants more. Most of me is still terrified of screwing it up."

"The wall?"

She nodded, suppressing a sob with the back of her hand. "More than anything, Rick, I can't lose you. You… you're too important to me."

His eyes finally migrated back to her face, and her heart broke at the depth of love she saw shimmering in the blue irises. "You won't lose me, Kate." He squeezed her hand. "I promise."

Her body felt drawn to him like a moth to a flame, and she pressed her lips to his in a tentative kiss. He groaned raggedly beneath her, his mouth trembling with the force of his restraint, and his hands fisted the sheets to keep from reaching out to pull her into the kind of kiss he so desperately wanted to give her. When she broke the kiss, she rested her forehead against his and fought to regain control of her wildly racing heart.

"Kate?"

"Yeah?"

"You're pressing your luck."

She laughed – a throaty chuckle that nearly undid his resolve – and she wriggled back to her side of the bed. "Got it." Throwing on the robe he'd loaned her, she set her feet to the carpet and headed for the bathroom. She paused in the doorway and glanced back to the man who lay, a bit rumpled and shell-shocked, against the sheets.

"Castle?"

He turned to look at her. "Yeah, Kate?"

"Thanks."

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><p><strong>Reviews? Yes please :)<strong>


	5. Chapter 5

"I hope I never have to end up in one of these places," Rick remarked in a low voice as he and Kate made their way through the maze of hallways at the Merrick Manor nursing home in Queens.

"Some people don't have a choice, Castle."

"There's always a choice."

"Well, then, to some people there doesn't _seem_ to be another option," Kate corrected herself.

"I'd settle for just about anything that didn't smell like this place." He sniffed the air experimentally. "It's a mixture of green beans and … something I'd rather not think about."

"Ssh, Castle," she reprimanded. "Not all nursing homes are as…"

"Gross?"

"I was going to say 'dismal' but 'gross' will work, too. Not all nursing homes are as gross as this one. Some of them are more like resorts."

"Okay," Rick acquiesced happily. "I'll just hope that Alexis puts me in one of those."

"Room 124," Kate read at the top of the door. "Here we are. Mrs. Brennan should be in the second bed."

"Is that the second bed from the window? Or the second bed from the door?"

She sighed but allowed a small smile to slip past her professional demeanor. "I don't know, Castle. But we're about to find out."

Fortunately for them, the bed closest to the door was unoccupied, and since they'd been told that Mrs. Brennan was in her room, they were left to assume that the elderly woman hunched into a wheelchair was the one they were seeking.

"Mrs. Brennan?" Kate crouched in front of the wheelchair, placing her smooth hand atop a wrinkled one on the other woman's lap. "Are you Edith Brennan?"

"No, ma'am," The elderly woman smiled sweetly at Kate, her eyes crinkling at the effort. "My name is Edith Elliott. Are you my new teacher?"

Kate cast a helpless glance in Rick's direction before gazing sympathetically back at John Brennan's next of kin. "No," she shook her head. "No, my name is Kate Beckett." Cocking her head curiously, she asked, "How old are you, Edith?"

"I'm almost 8 years old," the woman exclaimed proudly and leaned closer to Kate with a girlish twinkle in her faded blue eyes. "My birthday is on Tuesday."

"Congratulations," Kate told her with a sad smile. Exchanging a look with Rick, she pushed up into a standing position and squeezed the woman's hand. "I hope you have a happy birthday, Edith. We'll come back and see you again, okay?"

"Was it just me or did she lose about 80 years somewhere?" Rick muttered close to Kate's ear as they re-entered the hallway and began the long trek to the exit.

"Alzheimer's is awful," she offered in reply. "But at least she seemed happy. A friend of mine – her grandmother had it and she was trapped in anxiety all the time. It was heartbreaking."

"What did Nancy Reagan call it?"

"The long goodbye," Kate supplied, and Rick nodded.

"Yeah – I guess you say goodbye year after year after year as the person you love loses a bit more of herself."

"Well – for the purposes of our investigation, it would be nice if we knew when she was having a good day. I'll check with the nursing supervisor on our way out and see if they can notify us in case one of those comes around in the near future."

That task completed, the duo stepped into the sunshine and walked across the parking lot to Kate's car. The crisp fall day had a bit of a nip to it, and Castle took advantage of the opportunity to step closer to Kate and rest his hand at the small of her back.

"I was wondering," he began, his voice taking on a sexy timbre that made Kate shiver. "Would you … and I'm going out on a limb here … would you go out with me tonight?"

She paused by her car and turned to face him with a smile. "Like as a date?"

"Exactly like a date."

Her breath hitched, and her bottom lip migrated between her teeth nervously. "Castle, I don't know."

"No pressure," he promised her. "We don't have to talk about anything involving what I said at the cemetery and how you feel about it. But I've been wanting to ask you out for – well, basically since day 1 – but even more so since I admitted to myself how I feel about you. Now that I know that _you_ know, this need to date you is about to drive me crazy."

Lifting a hand, he tucked some hair behind her ear and drifted a light touch across her cheek. "Please? For me?"

She fought unsuccessfully against a grin and looked at her feet in an attempt to gain some semblance of normalcy in this situation. When she raised her eyes to his again, there was a teasing gleam mingled with the hazel. "Is this where I'm supposed to say 'I ain't afraid of no date'?"

His smile was instantaneous, and he pulled her into a light hug before she could protest. "That. Would. Be. _Awesome_."

Her chin on his shoulder, she noticed the lone piece of paper stuck to her windshield. "Castle … what's that?"

"Um… you felt that, huh?"

She pulled away and swatted his arm. "I _meant_ – what is that on my windshield."

"Right. I knew that. And… I don't know what that is."

She reached it first and yanked it free from the wiper that was doubling as a paperweight. Unfolding it, she examined it silently and immediately began scanning their surroundings, her hand at her hip holster. Rick plucked it from her fingers and read it for himself, aloud.

"Leave her alone. Don't come back. Quit asking questions." He pocketed it in his jacket, figuring that was the safest place for the time being and focused his gaze on Kate, who remained on alert. "Clearly, whoever left this note wasn't eavesdropping on our conversation with Edith."

Kate allowed a small smile in his direction. "Yeah, but they were afraid we had asked her something that she might have been able to answer. What do you think? Orderly? Nurse?"

"My money would be on the director of the home – I didn't like the way he looked at you."

"I believe the word you used earlier was 'leering'."

"Well, he was!"

"Castle – you have been known to leer at me too."

"Perhaps. But I have honorable intentions."

When she arched an eyebrow in disbelief, his cheeks dimpled in self-amusement. "Okay, maybe not completely honorable. But you're safe with me."

Surprising him, Kate reached up and brushed a kiss to his jaw. "I know."

"C'mon, let's take the note back to the precinct and let forensics take a look at it." She opened the car door and looked back at him over her shoulder.

"Castle? About that date?"

"Yeah?" He held his breath.

"Yeah."

* * *

><p><strong>Reviews please :)<strong>


	6. Chapter 6

"Any chance you can scoot out of here early?"

The gravelly question in her ear warmed Kate's insides, and she inclined her cheek toward the source. His nose bumped her temple, and she both heard and felt his breath stutter in response. Good lord, if they ever did more than flirt, she had a feeling they would both go up in smoke.

"You know, if you helped me with this paperwork, I'd get out of here a lot sooner." She bit her lip against a grin, keeping her eyes focused on the form she was currently completing.

"Or … you could just save the paperwork for later and leave with me now," he coaxed, letting his hand drift across her shoulder as he moved to sit down in his chair.

She glanced around the bullpen to see if anyone had noticed his behavior, but everyone seemed busy with their own work. "Why the rush?"

"Do I need a reason?"

At her glare, he nodded. "Right. I do. Okay. I made reservations for a pre-show dinner at a friend's restaurant and then we see the 8 o'clock showing of Wicked." He looked at her uncertainly. "That is, unless you've seen it already. Or if you'd rather do something else, that's fine, too."

She smiled fondly at him. "No, I haven't seen it. It sounds like you've really planned a nice evening, Rick. Thank you. I'm looking forward to it."

"Rick? Nice evening? Looking forward to it?" Ryan's voice broke through the moment, and Kate felt herself flush from head to toe at the knowing smirk on his face. "Since when do you call him 'Rick'?"

"Well… since…" She faltered and would have shipwrecked herself right there, if Castle hadn't stepped in to save the conversation.

"Yeah – I set her up on a date with one of my writer buddies. He saw some press stuff about the books and wanted to know who had inspired such stellar writing."

"Stellar writing, huh?" Ryan looked back and forth between the partners, his face indicating that he clearly did not believe Castle's story. But with a slow nod, he let it go for the time being. "You guys would let us know if … you know … the bets and all."

"What bets?" Kate's glare was back, this time directed at Kevin.

"Uh…" He hedged, shifting his weight from one foot to the other, his face like that of a deer caught in headlights. "There may or may not be a precinct pool where some people may or may not have placed bets on when you two would finally hook up."

One look at Kate's face had him scurrying back to his desk, but Castle's phone lit up seconds later indicating he had received a text message.

**I have major $ riding on this. U will tell us, right?**

He pocketed the phone without responding and looked back to Kate with a wink. "So… are you ready to leave?" Checking his watch, he added, "This should give us enough time to change before I come pick you up. Err… before my 'friend' comes to pick you up."

"Sure," she gave in after a moment's hesitation. "One second though."

She gathered up the paperwork from her desk with an efficient sweep of her hand and carried it across the room, dumping it unceremoniously on Ryan's desk. "Since you guys seem to have enough time on your hands for bets and things like that, I figured you had enough time to help me out with my reports."

Laughing at the expression on his face – and that on Esposito's across from him – she patted the fellow detective on his shoulder and leaned closer, a secretive glint in her gaze. "How do you know we haven't already 'hooked up' – me and Castle? You might already be a few hundred dollars richer."

They stared after her as she left, stopping at her desk to grab her coat and her bag and walking with Castle toward the elevator. Ryan was the first to speak as the doors dinged shut after the duo in question. "You don't think…?"

Esposito shook his head, but he didn't look too confident in his assurances. "Nah."

"I mean, we would have heard about it by now, wouldn't we?"

"I don't know, man. But I know who _would_ know."

"Lanie?"

Esposito nodded grimly. "And we aren't on speaking terms right now, so…"

"Dude! Why'd you have to go and make her mad?" Ryan retorted, oblivious to the dark look his partner was sending him. "She might be keeping all the win money for herself."

"I'm going to pretend you didn't conveniently forget about how our break up is all your fault," Esposito ground out between his teeth, shooting his partner one more pointed stare for good measure. "But relax – when Beckett and Castle finally hook up, I have a feeling the angels will start singing. We'll know about it."

* * *

><p>By the time Rick phoned from downstairs to tell her he was on his way up to her apartment, Kate was a bundle of nerves from top to bottom. She'd smoothed the imaginary wrinkles from her dress so often in the last 10 minutes, she was afraid she'd worn a hole in the material that covered her hip. Her hair was as good as it was going to get, and she hadn't been able to decide between the 'book party' or 'movie premiere' looks for her makeup.<p>

"This is ridiculous," she told herself. "It's a date. You've been on plenty of dates. No big deal."

But it _was_ a big deal, and she knew it. Taking this step meant eventually she'd either have to face the music and deal with the depth of her feelings for Castle or their friendship would be in shambles as they both went their separate ways. His knock on her door startled her from her thoughts, and when she opened it to see his awestruck face on the other side, her doubts flew out the window.

"Wow," he breathed. "You look… wow, Kate. You're stunning."

She started to thank him, but his lips gently pressed against her open mouth before she had a chance to put sound to the thought. A low moan vibrated in her throat and she ran her hand across his suit-clad shoulder before resting it at the nape of his neck and indulging in his expert kiss. This could get addicting…

"Sorry," he muttered against her lips after a moment. "I couldn't resist."

She grinned and stole a short peck of her own. "I wasn't complaining."

"Well," he shrugged, gazing at her with his heart in his eyes. "We hadn't talked about kissing yet."

"We haven't talked about a lot of things yet," she pointed out, reaching around him to grab her coat and the clutch she was using that evening. "And you promised we wouldn't start tonight."

He sighed, the slightest sag of disappointment to his features, but his dimples returned when she feathered her lips across his chin. "Except for the kissing," she amended with a grin. "We can talk about the kissing."

Hurrying to catch up to her, he placed his hand at the small of her back and followed her out to the street with delight in his step. "I'd rather 'do' the kissing, personally."

* * *

><p>They entered through the back entrance of The House restaurant – so they wouldn't risk making a trigger-happy paparazzo's day, he'd said. Or Ryan and Esposito's, she'd added. A hostess met them at the doorway and whisked them toward a small, private room on the 2nd floor. A breathtaking view greeted them, courtesy of the windows that overlooked Gramercy Park and the skylights overhead that afforded them a view of the starry skies.<p>

As she slid into the chair he held out for her, Kate drank in the views and the candlelit table for two with a growing sense of contentment. This felt right. She watched him as he sat down across from her, the romantic glow from the tapers making his features seem even more chiseled than usual.

"Do I have something on my face?" Rick asked, making a show of dabbing at his face with a linen napkin. "I haven't eaten anything yet. Maybe lipstick?"

"No," she assured him with a slow grin. "No, you don't have anything on your face. I was just thinking how much I … how lucky I am to have you in my life."

If he noticed her almost-admission of love, he didn't react. Instead, he simply returned her smile and poured some wine into the glass that waited at her place setting. "Not as lucky as I am to have you," he countered, raising his glass toward hers in a toast.

"To the start of something new."

* * *

><p><strong>Reviews are always craved ... errr... appreciated :)<strong>


	7. Chapter 7

"I had a really great time," Kate told him softly as they approached her door. Leaning against the frame, she added, "Really great."

He squeezed the fingers he'd claimed on the ride from the theater, refusing to relinquish them just yet. "Me too." Possession, protection, and love all did battle for domination in his heart.

"Wanna come in for a drink?"

He smiled but shook his head. "I do, but I think I should pass this time."

"Why?" Her brow knitted in confusion, and he longed to kiss the furrows away.

Patience kicked the other emotions to the curb. Winding a lock of curls around his palm, he spoke in a low drawl, "If I come in for a drink, I can't promise that I'll be able to keep my hands to myself."

"And that's a problem, how?" Kate's initial smile faltered at his eloquent, slightly sad, expression.

"Because… all these things that we aren't talking about? We need to talk about them before I feel free to … take advantage of your finer … you get my point."

Her quiet laugh eased his nerves, and she nodded. "I know, Castle. This isn't fair to you. I just can't – "

He placed two fingers against her lips and shushed her gently. "I promised no pressure tonight. And I am a man of my word." With each of the last 8 words, he moved closer until he was near enough to paint the lightest of kisses against her mouth. She groaned in protest and fisted her hand in his shirt, drawing him back for a more satisfying 'goodnight' when he tried to pull away.

Patience… patience…patience. He chanted the words to himself as a mantra, fighting to regain control of his raging need for this woman. She tasted of the crème brulee they'd shared for dessert and the wine they'd sipped after the show. "Kate, I wasn't kidding," he moaned around the demanding pressure of her lips, teeth, and tongue. When her hands joined the exploratory fray, he yelped and his hands joined the tangle in an attempt to capture her dangerously-wandering fingers.

"You are going to kill me," he panted in desperation as he succeeded in ending the torture she was masterminding. Patience…patience…patience… The mantra hummed through his body, calming sensitized nerves and bringing clarity to his fogged mind.

"Sorry," she whispered, though she didn't look the least bit apologetic. Her lips were parted, her breath shallow, and more black than hazel swirled through her irises.

"I know what you're doing." He waggled a finger in her face, a breathless catch to his voice. "You're trying to distract me with your… your womanly wiles… so that I'll ignore the stuff we're not talking about and jump into your bed – so that _you_ can forget the stuff we're not talking about."

She blinked, stunned that he knew her so well. That had been exactly what she was doing – even though she hadn't realized it until he'd said the words aloud. "Wow."

Slumping against the door, her whole body sagged with the weight of self-discovery, and she offered no protest when he pulled her gently into his arms. "That was a little harsh, wasn't it?" he muttered.

"No," she shook her head. "I needed that." Raising an eyebrow, she teased, "Womanly wiles?"

He grinned. "Sorry – the mystery writer in me took over."

"Yeah, well, I'm glad the friend in you took over back there too."

They exchanged silent looks deep with meaning before Rick took two steps away and rocked back on his heels. "I'll wait to make sure you get inside okay."

She quirked her mouth at his chivalry but made a show of producing her key and unlocking the door. "Night, Rick."

"Night, Kate."

Thinking she could stand there and stare at him all night, she finally tore herself away and closed the door with a final smile and wave. She dropped her coat and bag on the nearest chair and walked to the kitchen for a glass of water, lost in the memories of the night. Opening the freezer, she grabbed some ice and as she shut the door her reverie shattered into a million pieces.

A picture of her and Castle at dinner that night stared back at her, suspended on the refrigerator by one of those advertising magnets that come with your pizza order. Her heart frozen in her chest, she whirled around and took in the photo tucked in the groove of a cabinet. The photo taped to one of her shutters. The photos on the floor making a path down the hallway. All of them taken of her and Castle that evening on their date.

Hearing the clinking of breaking glass coming from her bedroom, she made a beeline for the chair where she'd left her clutch and retrieved the small gun she'd stowed in the black bag. She grabbed her cell phone and punched the digit that would speed dial Castle's number, forcing her voice to remain steady when he answered.

"Castle… somebody's in my apartment."

* * *

><p>"Kate!" He was calling her name before he'd even made it to her door, his heart drumming out a beat that matched the staccato thrumming of his shoes against the cement floors.<p>

"Kate!" It had taken him all of 5 minutes to make an about face and head back to her – 5 long, torturous minutes in which everything he'd ever said (and not said) to her had come back to haunt him.

"Kate!" He pounded on the door, and when it opened beneath the force of his fist, his breath left him as quickly as if someone had hooked his lungs up to a vacuum sealer.

"Kate!" Every part of his body screamed for him to barrel inside and save his damsel in distress (though he knew she'd string him up every which way from Sunday if he ever called her that to her face!). But the partner in him knew they might both end up dead if he did that.

Patience… patience … patience…

Looking around the hallway, he spied an umbrella lying abandoned near one of the other apartments. He picked it up to examine it, deciding that the heavy wooden handle might do in a pinch. Returning to Kate's door, he slowly pushed it open and bobbed his head in all directions, the umbrella at the ready. He listened and, hearing nothing, he called her name again, this time in a stage whisper. When a low moan drifted down the hall in response, he crept from door to door until he found her on the floor in her bedroom.

"Kate." He rushed to her side, helping her as she struggled to a sitting position, her hand to her blood-saturated temple, her gun still clutched at the ready. "Are you okay?"

She winced, but nodded, and placed a reassuring hand to his face as his look of panic registered. "I'm fine. He's gone now." She gestured to the open window and the subsequent fire escape before meeting Rick's eyes. "He got the jump on me – must have been hiding under the bed."

It occurred to him that his feet were crunching something as he crouched next to her, and he gazed at the remnants of the shattered hurricane lamp on the floor. "Did he hit you with this?"

She stared blankly at the debris and finally shook her head. "No. I'm pretty sure I heard this break when I first realized someone was here. I think he had his own gun." Testing the wound on her head, she grimaced as pain shot through her.

Rick gathered her into his arms and placed relieved kisses across her forehead, her nose, her chin, before landing on her lips with a grateful sigh. "Curse my chivalry," he groaned hoarsely, memorizing every soft curve that sank against him. "If I'd just come in for a drink, I would have been here."

"Castle, that's just ridiculous." She allowed him to help her to her feet, swaying a bit as a dizzy spell overtook her. Squeezing his arm to indicate she was ready to move, she walked with him down the hallway where he settled her in a chair. He kissed her forehead, ran his hand down her hair, before grabbing a towel from the kitchen and returning to press it gently against the gash on her temple.

"Who should I call?" he asked, already reaching for his cell phone.

She hesitated. "Did you see the photos?"

His brow wrinkled, answering her question, and she pointed to the hallway. "There's more around here and in the kitchen."

He yanked a handkerchief from his pocket and used it as a makeshift glove, carefully lifting the pictures from the floor, the shutter, the table, the fridge, the cabinet. "Kate… these are from tonight."

"I know."

"Someone was following us."

"It seems that way, yes." She took the towel away long enough to eye the amount of blood with a critical gaze, then pressed it back to the wound.

"You need a doctor."

"Call Lanie," she pleaded with him. "And Espo and Ryan, I guess. But tell them to come alone." At his questioning expression, she ducked her head somewhat shyly. "I just … I wanted us to get used to 'us' before everybody and their mother-in-law knew about 'us'. But, those pictures are evidence, so I'm going to have to bring in the guys whether I like it or not."

He knelt in front of her, took her hand (the one not occupied with the towel), and brought it to his lips, grazing her knuckles with a kiss. "I'll take care of it."


	8. Chapter 8

"Kate, you really need stitches and some good drugs," Lanie said even as she respected the detective's wishes and carefully placed some steri-strips across the gash that was still oozing some blood.

"I've had worse."

"Mmm-hmm. You should have had stitches and some good drugs then, too." Lanie smoothed Kate's hair away from the wound and looked her in the eyes. Holding her penlight steady, she shined it first in one eye, then the other, before pocketing it again, seemingly satisfied with the results. "No apparent concussion. But I'll tell Castle to watch you like a hawk until tomorrow morning."

Glancing over her shoulder at the worried writer, she smirked before turning back to Kate. "Although, I really don't think I even need to make it official. That boy isn't letting you out of his sight – maybe ever."

Kate smiled, catching Castle's gaze and drawing a tired grin from him as well. "Do you think the guys are giving him a hard time?"

"Probably," Lanie snorted as she used a gauze pad soaked with rubbing alcohol to dab at the blood caked to Kate's temple. "But I'd bet money he thinks you're worth it."

"According to the guys, you already have."

"Can you blame me?" Lanie teased. "When a sure thing comes along, it would be just plain idiotic not to cash in on the inevitable winnings."

"You really think Castle and I are a sure thing?"

Lanie glanced at her sharply. "Maybe you do have a concussion." Over her shoulder, she called, "Castle, make sure you keep an eye on this one tonight. She's starting to talk crazy."

With a soft chuckle, Kate accepted the proffered ibuprofen and popped them into her mouth, chasing them with a sip of water. Lanie began cleaning up her supplies, but paused for a moment to squeeze Kate's hand. "I'm really happy for you guys," she murmured with a wink.

Kate's eyes migrated toward Esposito who was trying diligently not to let his own gaze drift toward Lanie. She gave Lanie a sympathetic smile and pressed her fingers in reply. "Thanks."

Castle's frame suddenly blocked her view, and she turned her face to his as he crouched in front of her. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," she whispered, her eyes fluttering closed as he brushed his fingers across the fresh bandages at her temple. They popped open when his lips covered hers in a gentle kiss, and when he drew slightly away his eyebrows arched as though daring her to protest the display of affection.

"Did they give you a hard time?" she whispered instead.

He shrugged. "Only because Ryan lost the bet… and some of his hard-earned cash."

She grinned and allowed him to fold her into a protective embrace. "You scared some years off of me back there," he admitted against her hair.

"After the bank hostage deal, I think we're even."

He stared at her in disbelief. "Not hardly. Maybe you _do_ have a concussion."

"By the way," she began, her voice lilting on a note of amusement. She held up the umbrella that he'd discarded earlier at her feet. "Were you really going to try and save me with this?"

"It was all I had!" he defended himself with joking indignation, the humor in the situation appealing to him as well. "I was trying to improvise."

"Do you have a license to carry this weapon, Mr. Castle?" Her detective voice coated his senses in an oddly arousing way, even as she waved the ridiculous umbrella in his face.

His lips pursed in a boyish smirk, and he grabbed the handle of his makeshift weapon, tossing it to the side. "Come back to my place, Detective, and I'll show you."

Then, "Do you guys need us here?" he called to Esposito and Ryan, his gaze never leaving Kate's.

"No. We'll compare notes tomorrow. We're good for now. Take her home, Castle."

He didn't need to be asked twice, nor did he feel the need to comment on the fact that he was taking her _away _from her home. Gathering her into his arms, he silenced her protests of 'Castle, I can walk' with a firm kiss, drawing some whistles and catcalls from the peanut gallery behind them.

"At least let me get a change of clothes," she argued with him, sweeping a commanding hand in the direction of her bedroom.

"Nope," he shook his head. "Your clothes are part of a crime scene. Possible evidence," he explained as he made his way out the door, nodding a brief goodbye to their friends. "You'll just have to make do with whatever I come up with for you to wear."

"Castle," she sighed in frustration.

"Kate," he echoed back, mimicking her tone. Stealing another kiss, he felt her relax in his embrace and smiled against her lips. "That's better."

"I really can walk," she muttered into his shoulder.

"And I really want to carry you," he countered, stopping to adjust his grip on her before pushing open the lobby door with his rear end and stepping onto the street with her. As he settled her inside the car, he noticed the distant glaze that had come over her face and ran a finger delicately along her jaw.

"Do you think whoever did this is the same person that put that note on my car today?"

He shrugged. "I honestly have no idea. It doesn't seem likely – I mean, the note told us to leave and we did. Why would they retaliate against us for doing what they asked?"

Kate nodded in agreement. "It just doesn't make sense." She paused for half a beat then added, "Do you think it could have something to do with my mother's case?"

Hesitating, Rick felt his heart clench painfully. They'd promised they could keep Kate safe if he convinced her to drop her pursuit of the killer. Was it possible that they'd been wrong? "I don't think so," he told her, trying to convince himself as much as her. "We've seen – firsthand – that they'll just kill you. They're not going to go to the trouble to stalk us on a date, keep one of those photo printers handy, tack up the pictures all over your apartment, and then just knock you over the head and leave."

He didn't know whether to hope it was them or not.

* * *

><p>"Soooooo… how was your date?"<p>

Alexis' voice carried through the loft, alerted to her dad's arrival by the opening of the door. Her footsteps bounded down the stairs before she skidded to a surprised halt at the bottom.

"Oh! Sorry – apparently it's not over yet. Didn't mean to interrupt." Her impish smile brought red to Kate's cheeks, but Castle intervened, depositing Kate gently from his arms to the waiting sofa.

"You're not interrupting – yet," he corrected, hugging his daughter and planting a loud smack of a kiss to the top of her head. "Our _date_ was wonderful."

"Perfect," Kate chimed in, her smile adding truth to her statement.

"You didn't do something crazy and get married, did you?" Alexis looked back and forth between them with uncertainty. "Is that why you were carrying Kate? The whole over-the-threshold thing?"

"No," Rick denied, tweaking his daughter's nose for good measure. "_After_ the date, things kinda went downhill."

Kate turned her head so Alexis could see the bandage that had previously been kept from her view. "Kate!" Alexis exchanged a look with her father before hurrying to Kate's side. "Are you okay?"

"I'll be fine."

"_That _is still up for debate," Rick pointed out, glaring mildly at Kate in concern. "Dr. Parrish said we need to watch her tonight for signs of a concussion."

"What happened?"

Rick looked to Kate, saw the weariness lining her face, and decided she needed bed sooner rather than later. "We'll tell you in the morning," he promised Alexis. "Right now, I need to get Detective Beckett to bed and force her to stay there … even if the handcuffs have to come out."

"TMI," Alexis groaned, making a beeline for the stairs. "I'm going to my room and try to purge my mind of the implications of that statement before I need some serious therapy."

"Castle," Kate sighed in exasperation when Rick tried to help her off the couch. "I am _not_ an invalid!"

"I know," he acknowledged, stepping back to give her some space. "But you _are_ the woman I love, and I think that entitles me to pamper you a little bit after your run-in with a blunt object."

She stood there a moment, her eyes locked to his, searching for something she needed but couldn't even define. Finding it, she was in his arms before he could react, before she could stop herself. Kate kissed him as though he was her lifeline and, in many ways, she knew he was. Her hands framed his face, holding him still while she nipped, caressed, teased, and laved his mouth with her own. A guttural growl rumbled through his body, and his hands shot out to grip her hips and haul her against him until little more than a breath existed between them.

From chest to thigh, Kate's body hummed with new awareness of the contrast in curves and angles, soft swells and hard lines, female and male, Beckett and Castle, Kate and Rick. She splayed her hands behind his neck, moving one to his shoulder, stroking the muscles that bunched beneath his shirt. He moved his grip lower, in turns cupping her bottom and pressing her closer. His tongue joined the fray, and Kate gladly opened to him, caught up in the moment until she thought her heart would burst.

When his hand drifted north, toying with her bra strap, sliding around to stroke the underside of her breast, Kate murmured encouragement and began to fumble with the button on his suit pants. He shot away from her as though he'd been burned, his eyes wild with desire as he gazed back at her. Chest heaving, he raked his fingers through his already mussed hair and waited about two seconds before scooping her into his arms and carrying her through the office into his bedroom.

He set her down on the right side of the large bed, and she sighed with pleasure as the bazillion-thread-count sheets beckoned to her. She didn't even bother to get out of her dress, knowing the blood that had dripped onto her shoulder already meant it was ruined. A few more wrinkles wouldn't hurt anything. Kicking off her shoes, she heard Castle rustling around behind her and assumed he was changing clothes. She lay back gratefully against the plush pillow, being careful not to jostle her wound, and her heart leapt with reactions that were foreign to her when she felt the weight of Castle's body sink onto the bed next to her. His arms came around her, his lips caressed her shoulder then her ear then the back of her head. Resting his hand against her abdomen, he gathered her close until, contour to contour, they were as one as they could be with clothing in the way.

"Sleep now," he coaxed when she tried to wriggle closer. "While I still have some sanity left."

Kate felt the evidence of his need for her, and arousal slammed into her heart along with a startling clarity. This – _he_ – was her 'always'. A lone tear slid joyfully down her cheek, and she wiped it away discreetly before he noticed. Staying awake as long as her weary body allowed, she let the assurance of his love wash over her, completing something that had long been empty in her heart. She clutched his hand and surrendered to what she was sure would be the first peaceful sleep she'd had in ages.

She was right.

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><p><strong>Reviews are always (and shamelessly) craved! And they make me write faster ... <strong>


	9. Chapter 9

Something smelled delicious. The aroma from the kitchen wafted through her senses and coaxed her into wakefulness.

Something _felt_ delicious. Namely the line of kisses Rick was trailing across her neck and jaw line.

Kate stretched languidly, evoking a rough groan from Castle, his hand flexing at her waist. "Careful," he growled and nipped her ear, drawing her earlobe between his teeth before soothing it with his tongue.

She gasped out his name and shifted in his arms to better face him. Her hand at the nape of his neck, she tugged him down to meet her lips with a satisfied sigh. "Why do you have to be so noble?" she muttered into the kiss, teasing his chest hair with wandering fingers.

"I ask myself that every day," he replied against her skin as he explored the hollow of her throat and collarbone. His words, his kisses, and his caresses all sent thrills of pleasure jolting through her body.

"Castle…" she moaned softly. "We really need to get out of this bed."

Needed to. Not wanted to. Her choice of vocabulary was intentional.

Realizing he'd reached the point where further self-torture would just be cruel to his male parts, he released her with a final desperate kiss and flopped to his back, his arm slung over his eyes. "How is it possible to want someone this badly?"

She stayed where she was, knowing that if she snuggled into him as she so desperately wanted to do, they'd never get out of bed. Propping herself up with her elbow, she asked, "Did you get any sleep last night?"

He uncovered one eye to stare at her incredulously. "Are you kidding? This," he gestured toward his boxers to the very obvious manifestation of how much he wanted her, "made that pretty much impossible."

"I'm sorry," she apologized sincerely. "I'm sure it didn't help that you had to keep waking me up every couple of hours to check me for a concussion."

"Well, no," he admitted, rolling to his side to face her. "But you're adorable when you're half-asleep."

"I've been thinking. Let's set a date where we're going to talk about… all this stuff we're not talking about," Kate suggested. "Then I can't run away from it, but I have time to prepare myself for it."

"Okay," he agreed immediately. "How's this afternoon sound?"

Kate laughed and swatted his shoulder. "Not what I meant."

A knock on the door interrupted their conversation, and Martha's voice filtered into the room. "Richard? Alexis said that Kate was here and probably needed some clothes to wear. I went to the guest room, but it's empty. Is she in there with you?"

Even as she spoke, she pushed the door open and stuck her head around the barrier. "Oh, hello, Kate. Alexis said you were hurt. Are you okay?"

Kate bit her lip against a bemused smile and nodded, "I'll be fine, Martha. Thanks. Just a little sore."

Noticing her son and the glare daggers he was shooting her direction, Martha rolled her eyes and swept a dramatic hand into the room. "I'll leave these clothes for you on Richard's desk. I'd bring them to you, but my son is currently giving me a death stare so I feel safer out here."

Looking pointedly at Rick, she added, "Breakfast is ready whenever you're ready to let Kate out of bed."

As soon as she had shut the door behind her, Kate grinned and buried her head in Rick's chest to hide her embarrassment. "That's my family," he quipped. "No boundaries."

He kissed the top of Kate's head and rubbed his hand lightly down her arm. "Two weeks from today? Does that give you enough time?"

Kate snorted. "I would have settled for two days from now."

"A week then?"

"Deal." She smiled up at him and placed a chaste kiss to the side of his mouth. "Thank you."

"Just be glad I didn't tell you to start talking while I helped you out of your now very-wrinkled dress."

Laughing, Kate slid out of the bed, wincing as pain throbbed in her temple. "Honestly? I wouldn't have argued with you."

"_Now_ she tells me," he bemoaned comically as he stuffed a pillow over his face in mock frustration.

* * *

><p><strong>~*~Two days later~*~<strong>

Rick watched Kate as she listened to the caller on the other end of her cell phone. He was trying to figure out who she was talking to, but he kept getting distracted by the way she licked the syrup from her lips after each bite of pancake. Forcing himself to look away, he glanced around the diner where they'd met for breakfast, absorbing the many sights and sounds and faces that swirled into the background.

"5 days," he muttered under his breath, drumming his fingers restlessly against the tabletop. "5 more long days."

"Hold your horses, cowboy."

He glanced up at her sheepishly. "Sorry – didn't realize you were off the phone."

Taking the check from the waitress, he smiled his thanks and turned back to Kate, oblivious to the buxom blonde's attempts to flirt with him. "And for the record, it's not my horses I want to hold."

He slapped some cash down on top of the check and wrinkled his forehead in confusion when Kate laughingly shook her head. She plied the ticket out from beneath the crisp bills and dangled it in front of his eyes. "Did you really not notice that she gave you her number?"

Staring blankly at the digits that were plainly scrawled across the check, he felt a slow grin of wonder stretch across his face. "I really didn't. Huh." He followed Kate from the booth and hooked an arm loosely at her waist as they wound their way through the maze of tables toward the exit. "That's interesting."

"Interesting that she gave you her number? Or interesting that you didn't notice it?"

She felt a kiss brush her temple, just above where her hair hid the steri-strips that still kept the gash closed. "People give me their numbers all the time – mostly women," his low voice caressed her ear. "I haven't called anyone in the past couple of years, thanks to you."

Her smile showed her pleasure at his words, and they walked side-by-side toward her car, his arm tucking her closer. "A few months ago, right after you were shot, I thought the amount of phone numbers just dropped off. Now I'm wondering if I just wasn't paying attention."

"You'd better not regret that," Kate teased, knowing full well that he didn't.

"Are you kidding? Even if I did, I'd never admit it," he joked back. "I have not forgotten that you carry a gun."

"Hah!" she nudged him in the ribs with a gentle elbow, and he captured her to him for a slow, lingering kiss in what didn't really amount to much retaliation.

"Who was that on the phone?"

"Oh – that was the nursing home director. He said Edith seems to be fairly alert today, in case we wanted to talk to her some more."

"You mean, in case we wanted to ruin her good day by telling her that her son is dead?"

Kate grimaced. "Yeah. I was thinking about that. I mean, really, why do we even need to tell her? We could tell my grandmother something during one of her good moments, and in about thirty minutes it was like we'd never said anything. Maybe poor Edith would be better off just never having to know – even for a few minutes – that John died."

Nodding, Rick stopped by the car and leaned his hip against the door, still holding Kate around the waist. His fingers tickled her waist above the band of her slacks. "So are we going out there anyway?"

"I guess so," Kate agreed reluctantly. "We can at least ask her some questions about John – see if we get any insight about who could have done this and why."

"Okay. I'll text Esposito and let him know," Rick offered, pulling out his phone to Kate's nod. He grabbed her hand when she would have headed to the driver's side of the car and tugged her back into his arms.

"Have I told you today yet that I love you?"

Kate felt her eyes grow annoyingly misty at the romantic gesture, and she buried her face in the collar of his shirt to hide her emotion. "Today? I don't think you have yet."

"Well," he remedied, tipping her chin to steal a kiss. "I love you, KB."

She wanted to say it back to him so badly. The words _I __love __you __too, __Castle_ were on the tip of her tongue. Right there. All she had to do was inhale and exhale and engage her vocal chords. Instead, she kissed him back, hoping he could feel it pulsing in her touch, hear it whispering in her sigh, and see it shining from her eyes.

It would have to be enough for now. But not for long.

* * *

><p><strong>See that little review link down there? I'd love for you to click it and let me know what you think :)<strong>


	10. Chapter 10

"Hello, Kate, darling."

Kate looked up from her laptop and smiled at Martha as the older woman sailed dramatically into the room. "Hi, Martha. Castle went out to get some food."

"Yes, I know, dear. We spoke in the lobby."

She settled in the overstuffed chair across from where Kate had curled herself into the couch. Her bright teal pantsuit was garishly accessorized with a multi-colored belt and large, chunky beaded jewelry. Kate hid a smile, thinking that even in the saucy getup she still didn't look out of place in Castle's neutral loft. Perhaps he'd thought of his mother's wardrobe penchant while decorating. The idea forced Kate to swallow a chuckle, and she tried to focus on what Martha was saying.

"He said you were going to head out to see that poor woman tomorrow in Queens."

"Yeah," Kate nodded, shutting her laptop and letting it take a break on the coffee table. Mostly spam emails awaited her anyway. "We were going to go today, but the director called us before we got very far. Said she had suffered a stroke and they were rushing her to the hospital. He called me back about an hour ago – told me that if we wanted to talk to her, we'd better do it soon."

"Will tomorrow be too late?"

"I hope not." Kate stretched her legs out from their cramped position and wiggled her toes to coax the blood back to the extremities. "The doctor seemed to think we had enough time to wait – and that it would be better to wait until tomorrow, in fact. But she's still touch and go, so we'll see."

Martha absorbed this information and then watched Kate with the knowing eyes of another woman, of a mother. Nudging the detective's foot, she cocked her head to the side and weighed her next words carefully before speaking. "In the bank that day… you really had forgotten the rest of us were there, hadn't you?"

Kate glanced up sharply, searching Martha's gaze for the motive behind the change in topic. Seeing only affection and understanding in her eyes, Kate averted her own gaze and shrugged. "Not…really. No." She picked at an invisible (perhaps imaginary?) piece of lint on her sweater. "He was just …"

"The only one that mattered to you right then?"

Kate's eyes wandered back to Martha's face, frustrated at the moisture that teased her own lashes. She considered denying it, but she knew that Castle's mother would see right through her. Already had, as a matter of fact. Hence, this line of discussion. "He was, yes. I'm … I'm sorry."

"Oh for heaven's sake," Martha protested, waving a dismissive hand in the air between them. "Don't apologize, Kate. He's your _partner_ – you had every right not to notice a single one of us until he was taken care of."

Relaxing visibly, Kate pulled her feet back underneath her and looked as if she wanted to comment further on that day's events. When a few moments of silence passed instead, Martha leaned forward and chucked a finger beneath Kate's chin to gain her attention before letting her hand fall to cover Kate's wrist.

"He's more than your partner, though, isn't he, kiddo? You love him."

Kate opened her mouth, not even knowing what she would say in response to that observation, but – to her horror – no sound came out except a choked moan. Leaving her chair, Martha moved to the spot next to Kate on the couch and pulled her into a somewhat smothering hug.

"What are you afraid of, my dear? Surely you know by now how deeply he loves you." Kate nodded helplessly against Martha's shoulder, prompting the older woman to continue. "I have seen him at the beginning, in the middle, and at the end of all of his other relationships, and I have to tell you – no one except Alexis has ever made him light up or worry or grieve or laugh or walk on air like you do. Like you have from the very beginning."

She dipped her chin so she could look Kate in the eye. "You have nothing to be afraid of, sweet Kate. He's in this for the long haul. And I can honestly tell you that I've never said that about any of the rest of his relationships." Standing to her feet, she stroked Kate's cheek with a motherly hand. "And that includes his marriages. _Especially_ his marriages."

With a final, dramatic eye roll heavenward, Martha squeezed Kate's shoulder and made her way toward the stairs, calling behind her, "Just something for you to feast on until Richard comes back."

Kate slumped against the cushions and finally found her voice. "Martha - It's not him I'm afraid of," she admitted faintly in the direction Martha had gone. "It's me."

Rick's mother stopped in her tracks and pivoted to face the detective. She retraced her steps and sat down on the coffee table across from where Kate sat on the couch. "What are you afraid of?" she asked, for the second time that evening. Before Kate could respond, Martha began to answer for her. "Are you afraid that you'll hurt him? Kiddo, I've got news for you. You will." She flung her arms in the air with the drama only a seasoned actress can produce, a slight grin tugging at her overly-painted lips. "We all hurt the people we love eventually – it's part of being human, I wager. And guess what? He'll hurt you, too."

"I just …" Kate struggled to put words to the emotions that ate at her. "Every other relationship has fallen apart – because of me and my inability to get past my mother's death and let someone in. I don't want that to happen with Rick."

"Oh, honey." Martha tucked some stray hair behind Kate's ears and smoothed the curls with a mother's touch that made Kate's heart ache with memories. "You've already let him in. Farther than anyone else has ever gotten, if I'm not mistaken." She leaned forward conspiratorially. "And I don't mean physically, if my son's cold showers and cranky mood are any indicator."

Kate felt a horrified flush rise from her neck to her scalp, remembering Castle's quip the other day about how his family had no boundaries. Oh, but she loved their quirkiness – almost as much as she loved him.

"I know, I know," Martha waved a hand in the air. "I'm not supposed to know about these things. But, Kate… He knows about your mother's case. You've let him be a part of it – something you haven't shared with any of your other paramours, if I understand what you're saying. He loves you, kiddo. You're stuck with him."

A smile found its way to Kate's lips, and she accepted the older woman's hug with gratitude. "Thanks, Martha. I needed –"

The words choked in her throat as the front door swung open, Castle's low voice piercing her senses. "Honey," he joked. "I'm home."

Patting Kate's knee, Martha stood up and bent to whisper a parting thought. "That's my cue."

Aloud, she called toward the kitchen. "Richard, I think I'm going to take a nice _long_ bath before I eat. Save me some?"

"I make no promises," he threw back, probably only half-joking.

Kate unfolded her legs and left the safety of the couch to find Rick as he unloaded Styrofoam boxes from a large brown paper bag. She stepped in to help, fingers brushing his as clarity finally began to descend. Her movements stilled, the box she was holding discarded on the counter, and she turned to pull him into a tight embrace. His arms instantly surrounded her.

Burying her face in the side of his neck, she whispered, "I love you, too."


	11. Chapter 11

_**Just a little something to tide us over until Castle tonight ... **_

* * *

><p>Rick's entire body froze at her declaration of love – his brain momentarily shut down, and even his heart missed a few beats beneath her cheek. Kate slid her hand beneath his collar, as though willing his senses to regain life at her touch. Her pulse pounded frenetically in her chest, waiting, wondering, fighting the urge to take back what she'd just said. And then his voice, soft and strained, broke his stunned silence.<p>

"Just to make sure I'm not dreaming or having a seizure, could you say that again?"

She edged away, still in the circle of his arms, just enough to scan his face, startled to see moisture brimming in his eyes. Reaching up with her hand, she used her thumb to capture a renegade tear that had spilled down his cheek and found herself suddenly unsure of how to proceed. "Do you have seizures often?"

Okay, maybe not the best thing to lead with … but it was all she had at the moment.

"Never," he shook his head. "But that's not what you said."

Biting her lip, she grinned and locked her hands behind his neck once more, letting her weight rest against his hold at her back. "Do you dream a lot?"

"About you? Always." He returned her grin, his features visibly relaxing, but uncertainty still lurked in his gaze. "Please, Kate," his eyes grew serious, his expression earnest. "Say it again. I need to be sure I heard you."

"You heard me," she whispered, emotion lodged in her throat making her voice thick and hoarse – but her eyes shone steady and true. "I love you, too."

He acted so fast she was unable to react, but in an instant she was spinning through the air, caught in his elated embrace, barely registering his laughter that pointed to a man who had just been relieved of a large burden heavy on his shoulders. Deciding that hanging on tight was her best recourse, she pressed her lips to his ear and did just that. After a few breathless moments, he set her back on her feet and proceeded to steal all the air from her lungs once more – this time with a kiss that quite literally curled her toes.

His hands lifted first to her cheek, then glided to thread through her hair and tilt her head for better access to the depths of her mouth. Paying homage to the profile that drove him to distraction in both his waking and sleeping hours, he traced her jaw with trembling fingers, following close behind with his lips – sucking, nipping, soothing, until Kate feared she would melt to the ground in a puddle of need. Her neck became his next target, his kisses trailing across the column of her throat, branding her as his without leaving a mark.

"Do you have any idea how long I've waited to hear you say that?" Rick murmured against her skin, absorbing her shivered reaction with his own frame. Rising to meet her eyes, he shook his head in wonder. "I just went to go get dinner…What changed?"

Kate dipped her chin and chuckled. "Believe it or not – your mother."

Eyebrows shot to the ceiling. "I can't wait to hear about this. And remind me to thank her. But later." The last two words left his mouth on a hungry growl, and he lowered his head to capture her lips again. This time, she gave as good as she got, and the food was quickly forgotten in a tangle of limbs, lips, and sighs of desire.

"Kate," he breathed raggedly when an eternity (or maybe just a few minutes) had passed, coming to his senses long enough to take in his surroundings.

The woman he loved – the woman who loved him back – was cradled between his body and the island, one bar stool kicked across the floor for having the audacity to be in the way. Her sweater was bunched under his hands, exposing the smooth toned skin of her abdomen. Suppressing a groan, he pressed his hips forward, the intimacy of their position heightened by the fact that Kate's legs were wrapped tightly around his waist. He wanted her. Wanted her more than he'd ever wanted another woman on God's green earth. Or in outer space. Or anywhere else a woman could be. He wanted her more than all others.

"All this stuff we're not talking about?"

"I hate that stuff," Kate groaned, resting her forehead against his with an irritated whack.

"Can we just pretend – just for tonight – that we've talked about it already?"

She laughed softly and crooked her head to the side to let her gaze lazily drift across his face. "That depends. Can you pretend tomorrow that these things aren't still here?" She waved a hand in the minimal space that existed between their bodies. "Between us?"

"I want to," he moaned, pressing his lips to her brow. "How about this – I acknowledge the 'I love you' that you said to be a helluva start in talking about all these things… and I abandon my previous protests about needing to talk about all of them before we make love."

"Castle?"

"What?"

"You talk too much."

Her hands on either side of his face, she dragged his lips to hers and kissed him with a wild passion that told him how much she'd ached for him, how much she craved his touch. "Bedroom."

Stumbling to navigate their joined-but-for-clothes bodies through the great room toward his suite, Rick paused at the door. "Are you sure, Kate?"

"Castle, I swear. If you don't take me to bed right now, I will get my gun and shoot you."

He needed no further encouragement, merely thankful that he had the presence of mind to shut the office door and the subsequent bedroom door behind them, lost as he was in her intoxicating kisses. As Kate tumbled to the bed, sinking into its pillowy softness, she reached out her arms to him and felt the breath leave her as his weight covered her.

"Rick – I'm sure. 100%. I love you."

She kissed him. "I love you," she whispered again.

One more kiss. "I love you."

His lips possessed hers, silencing her, and her back arched to get as close to him as their clothing allowed. Her murmurs of love mingled with his own groaned declarations, and it wasn't long before both lost the ability to form words, their voices fading into moans, caught up instead somewhere between the primal and the sacred.

As they lay together afterward and struggled to regain their ability to breathe smoothly, Kate whimpered in sated contentment and traced idle patterns against Rick's chest. He in turn ran a hand up and down her arm, his mind stripped as bare as his body, a smile plastered (permanently?) across his face.

"That was so worth the wait," he sighed. When Kate mmm'ed in agreement, he let his hand drift toward the scar below her breast – the scar that had painfully twisted his heart with memories when he'd laved it with kisses during his careful (and thorough) exploration of her body. His fingers tracing the puckered outline, he grazed the top of her head with a kiss and whispered the words he'd been the first to say.

"Kate… I love you." His palm cradled the scar protectively as he added, "I love you, Kate."

Her eyes closed against the recollection of his voice beckoning to her from the darkness from that day, and she curled into his side, seeking the warmth and safety he offered. "I love you, too."


	12. Chapter 12

"Look on the bright side, Kate. At least it's more comfortable than that freezer. I mean, if we're going to die here, at least we can die at room temperature."

"Castle, would you please quit talking like that? We're not going to die."

"Of course we're going to die, Kate. Everybody dies." At her glare, he raised his arms and clasped his hands casually behind his head. "I've noticed something. You still call me Castle whenever you're … chastising… me."

Kate grinned, pausing in her pacing to soften her glare into a fond gaze. The bruises and scrapes marring his handsome face made her heart ache. She knew she didn't look much better. "Castle…"

"See?"

"… The guys will find us. I have faith in them."

* * *

><p><em><strong>~*~ 6 hours earlier~*~<strong>_

_"So do you think there's really anything to this 'beady-eyed' orderly that Edith was talking about back there?"_

_Kate pulled her car smoothly from the parking spot and began driving away from the hospital, shaking her head in frustration. "I don't know. Honestly? I think it's a stretch. But I called Espo and told him that we would stop by the nursing home to see what we could find out."_

_"What does your gut tell you?"_

_She bit her lip and slowed to wait for a traffic light to turn green in the distance. Glancing down at the brake pedal, she frowned. "I think I need to take this car into the police garage and let them look at it. The brakes seem to be sticking."_

_"I can let my guy look at it if you want."_

_Shooting him a sidelong glance, she looked back at the road. "Are you going to try to pay for everything of mine now that we're dating?"_

_"I didn't offer to pay for it," Rick corrected with a grin. "I said I can have my guy **look** at it. Your feminine independence – and my wallet – remain intact."_

_Kate 'humphed' at him but softened the snort by placing her hand over his thigh with a teasing touch. "My gut… tells me that something is locked inside Edith's brain that could break this case wide open. But nobody has the key. Not even Edith."_

_"Hey – turn here!"_

_Obeying on instinct, she raised her eyebrows curiously. "Did you see something?"_

_"Huh? Oh. No. I just know a shortcut. Well, okay, it's not a shortcut, per say, more of a scenic route back to the city. Just seemed more romantic than the Queensboro Bridge."_

_Grinning, Kate chuckled but kept driving. "Is that code for – 'There's a great make-out spot on this road –?"_

_"It's possible," he winked at her and grabbed her hand when it began to stray dangerously north. "Minx."_

_She blushed and forced herself to pay attention to the road that had turned curvy, winding through a river-front preserve that she hadn't known existed. Sharp drop-offs taunted her on either side, and she caught her breath as a large RV barreled too far into her lane on its way past. Tugging her hand from Rick's, she gripped the steering wheel with both hands and tapped the brake to reduce their speed. Panic stopped her heart when the motion yielded no response._

_"What's wrong?" Rick's voice was hoarse with concern._

_"The brakes won't work. I can't stop the car!" She tried to adjust the steering wheel but it locked up under her touch. "The steering wheel's frozen."_

_Rick met her eyes, the fear flecked with the green twisting his heart. He looked at the road in front of them, the current stretch coming to an end quicker than he would have liked, the drop-off looming ominously. "Okay… I saw this in a movie. We open the doors and we jump out, hit the ground and roll. At the count of 3."_

_She didn't like this idea. But she didn't have time to argue with him. It was as good a plan as any. And knowing Rick, his dumb ideas usually worked. When he hit '3', she squeezed his hand, opened her door and flung herself from the racing vehicle, praying Rick had followed from his side. She could feel the asphalt clawing at her clothes, her skin, scraping it raw. Gravel, dirt, and grass imbedded themselves in her pores, and she spat out a conglomeration of blood and road dust when she finally rolled to a stop. She forced her bruised limbs to work, dragging her body upright and looking around frantically to find where Rick had landed. Spying him in the dirt a few yards away, she went running toward him even as he gingerly dusted himself off and opened his arms to her._

_"I can't believe that worked," he murmured into her hair, and the nervous energy in Kate bubbled up in a fit of giggles. They watched – almost as though it were a movie – as the car hit the guardrail and tumbled over the side in a somersault of Olympic proportions. They heard it hit once – twice – and then come apart at the bottom in a fireball. The force of the explosion knocked them backwards, and Rick turned his body, shielding Kate from the heat of the blast. Closing his eyes, he planted reassuring kisses along her forehead, breathing silent prayers that they were safe._

_The click of a gun – cocked and ready – made him realize he had been thankful a moment too soon. He felt Kate tense in his arms and knew she'd heard it too. Raising his gaze, he sucked in a breath of disbelief. "You've **got** to be kidding me."_


	13. Chapter 13

"Unless your escape plan involves wearing a hole in the floor of this safe, could you please stop pacing and come here?"

Rick's voice held a mixture of childish whine and manly nonchalance, and Kate slumped against the steel door in frustration. "Vault," she heard herself retort.

"What?"

"Vault," she repeated, turning to face him with the beginnings of a resigned smile. "You said it yourself at Brennan's house – floor to ceiling, bank model. Remember?"

"Yes, you're right. Or I'm right. Whichever. A safe goes in the wall. A vault is big enough to walk around in – as you've been so aptly demonstrating."

Tilting her head ruefully, Kate abandoned her nervous expending of energy and slouched to a seat next to him, her hand resting on his thigh, her head hitting the vault wall with a muffled 'thwack'. "How did we get here?"

The question had been rhetorical – it wasn't as though she'd been unconscious for any of it – but he answered as though she'd wanted a reply. "Well… crazy deranged fan – number, I've-lost-count – kidnapped us at gunpoint after your car went over a cliff and exploded. Which of course happened on our way back to the city after talking with Edith who thought she was eight but told us we should check out the beady-eyed intern."

Hysterical laughter erupted from Kate's throat before she could restrain herself, and her head fell against Rick's shoulder even as he began to shake with the force of his own amusement. "This is ridiculous," she gasped out after a moment. "Is there a full moon tonight or something?"

"Gotta be," Rick agreed, wrapping his arm around her and tucking her closer into his side, smiling when her hand rose to find a home on his chest, her fingers sliding between the buttons of his shirt. "At least we're in one of those fancy-schmancy vaults with temperature control and air vents. More like a panic room, really."

He paused, relishing in the feel of her touch, her closeness, before speaking softly, "Seriously, though, Kate… how are the boys going to know where to even begin looking for us? They're going to find the car at the bottom of that drop-off, burned to a crisp, and it's going to take how long to determine there are no human remains in it?"

Sighing, Kate sat up fully and rubbed her hands over her eyes, drawing her knees to her chest as an armrest. "I don't know, Castle. I do hate to say it – I have faith in Javier and Kevin – but you're right, they can't work a miracle this steep. I think getting out of here is going to be up to us."

With a grim look at the impenetrable door, he nudged her with his shoulder. "Know any magic words along the lines of 'open sesame'?"

"Nope. I'm fresh out."

Even as she spoke her retort, they heard a dim beeping from beyond the door and the heavy steel began to creak open after a series of clicks and clacks within the lock mechanism. The partners exchanged a look, and both tried to shield the other from harm as their captor appeared in the newly-made opening.

"Aren't you two cute?" The words held no kindness, only contempt. "Get up!"

"No," Castle answered, holding Kate's hand tightly in his larger one, his voice conveying a calm he did not feel. "I'm pretty comfortable here, thanks."

"It wasn't a suggestion." The chunky brunette – whose hair had been styled in an obvious, though unsuccessful, attempt at mimicking Kate's loose curls – stalked toward the duo and kicked at Rick's shoe as she pointed her gun in Kate's face. "Get. Up."

As Rick began to obey, Kate squeezed his hand and tugged him back to the floor, her gaze steady and defiant down the barrel of the woman's gun. "Sit down, Castle. She's not going to shoot you."

"True," she sneered, her eyes briefly flicking to Rick's paling face. "But I can't say the same for you, Nikki Heat."

"The name's Kate. And if you shot me now, it would defeat whatever purpose you've kidnapped me for. You'd have to find some other form of leverage, and we both know that's only going to attract more attention."

"Hmmm." Their captor's voice seemed noncommittal, and Kate felt a heartbeat of panic as she advanced even closer. "Shooting you would, in fact, delay my plan." Her hand rose, and the butt of the gun met Kate's face with a sickening crunch that had Castle on his feet, her name at his lips.

"I thought that might work." She smiled at Rick with something in her expression that made his skin crawl. Gesturing with the gun, she nodded toward Kate. "Pick her up and bring her out here."

She left the vault for the room beyond and watched to make sure he was following her orders. Kneeling in front of a dazed Kate, he brushed some blood-matted hair away from her cheek and pressed his lips above the broken skin. "I'm so sorry," he murmured before hoisting her into his arms and carrying her into the outer room.

He scanned his surroundings, looking for a way out, surveying the layout of their prison. A massive desk occupied one corner of the room, a laptop and printer covering the majority of its surface area. An office chair waited behind the desk for an occupant, and a wing-backed chair in the center of the floor was the only other piece of furniture. "Put her there," the kidnapper commanded, indicating the wing-back.

Castle obeyed, and as Kate slid from his arms to gently rest on the seat, she flicked her eyes to meet his. Clarity stared back at him, and he understood that she wasn't nearly as out of it from the blow as he'd feared. It was an act. She had a plan. At least he hoped it was and he hoped she did.

A pair of handcuffs was tossed at him, the gun still aiming directly at Kate. "Cuff her to the chair," came the order. He did as instructed but stopped just short of clicking the metal completely into place, brushing Kate's wrist with a light touch as he stepped away. Heart sinking, he watched as the crazed woman edged closer to the chair to check his work and he nearly sagged in relief when she merely eyed the mechanism and deemed it properly locked.

"Good. Now, you. Over there." She waved the gun toward the desk, and he moved to sit down at the desk chair.

"If you're going to order me around, do I at least get to know your name?"

"Renee," she answered after a brief hesitation. "I brought you here because you've been getting much too distracted, spending time with Nikki Heat. You're going to dinners and Broadway shows, and she's spending most nights at your loft. You already see her all day at work. Someone needs to step in and make sure you get your nights back."

"And that someone is you?"

"Cute _and_ smart," she scoffed. He could see insanity swirling in her eyes, and it chilled him to the bone. "Now. You're going to write your next book, here with me."

"That's all this is about?" Rick asked incredulously. "You kidnapped me to force me to work on my book?"

"No. I brought you here to write a very special book. The one where Nikki Heat dies." The smile on her face turned diabolical and she circled Kate's chair like a shark. Castle clenched every muscle in his body, willing himself to exercise some patience and common sense like Kate had taught him to do. She stopped to swirl Kate's hair around her fist and jerked her hand, tugging Kate's head backward with a loud snap and bringing Rick to his feet in anger.

"You're going to write her death," Renee purred. "And as you write it, I'm going to carry it out. Word. For. Word."

* * *

><p>"Detectives Ryan, Esposito?"<p>

Both men glanced up as their captain stopped at their desks with a concerned furrow to her features. "Have either of you heard from Detective Beckett and Mr. Castle lately?"

They looked at each other and simultaneously shook their heads. "No, sir."

"Beckett called me this morning and told me that they were heading to that nursing home in Queens to follow up on a lead they got from Brennan's mother," Esposito told Gates, worry began to creep into his voice. "But that was over 6 hours ago."

"They should be back by now," Ryan agreed, a smirk appearing as a thought occurred to him. "Unless they decided to –"

At Esposito's warning cough, he cut himself off and hurriedly added, "Unless they decided to grab some lunch and got stuck in traffic on the way back in."

Gates became momentarily distracted by her cell phone ringing, and Ryan shrugged helplessly as Esposito glared at him. Pressing the button to end the call, Gates' eyes shifted grimly back and forth between the two detectives. "That was Detective Quinn with the 111th precinct. A car ran off the road today in Queens and exploded on impact. They called me because the license plate had our official tags and was registered to our precinct."

Esposito cursed, standing to his feet, and Ryan brought his hand to his mouth as the horror of her words began to register. "Beckett and Castle?" he managed to utter, his voice betraying his shock and the beginnings of grief.

Gates gave a sober nod. "They said there's no way to tell if they were in the car at the time of the … accident. They're running tests to check for human remains, but it will be at least a couple of days before they know anything – and that's putting a priority rush on it since they're part of us." She placed a hand on Esposito's shoulder. "I want you two to head down there and see for yourself if there's anything that puts them at the scene."

They muttered their agreements but stayed rooted to their spots in stunned disbelief for more than a few moments after Gates had retreated to her office. "Do you think they—?"

"Don't say it," Esposito snapped at his partner, apologizing instantly with a softened facial expression. "We'll find them."

* * *

><p><em><strong>Cue the dramatic music - and the reviews! :)<strong>_


	14. Chapter 14

_**A/N: So apparently there's a book/movie called Misery that bears a resemblance to this plotline. I've never read it or seen the movie, but I've been doing some research since a couple of people brought it up. Hopefully, where I'm headed is different enough from the plot of Misery to hold your interest. And for the people that have asked (LOL) no, my name isn't Renee ;)  
><strong>_

* * *

><p>"Look, Renee. I can't write without my coffee." He closed the lid of the laptop and stiffened as she came forward menacingly. "Ask Kate."<p>

"It's true," Kate piped up from her chair. "He's very picky. Has to be from this little coffee shop by the precinct. Special-made custom order."

"I didn't say you could speak!" Renee snarled, lashing out at Kate with the gun barrel across her face and rendering her temporarily unconscious.

Rick clenched his fists and his jaw, his heart breaking, but forced his voice to stay light and unaffected. "Yes, if you could go there and tell them that you're picking up an order for Richard Castle – have them make my usual. Then, I'll be happy to write whatever you want me to write."

Renee hesitated, looking from Castle to Kate to the door and back again. Finally, she nodded and beckoned Rick with the gun. "Move your chair over here."

He obeyed, his eyes fixed on Kate, wondering if she was really unconscious or just lying in wait for her chance to kick Renee's … butt. As the psychotic captor in question unlocked the handcuffs (that weren't really locked to begin with) and threaded the chain through the slats in the chair's back, Rick decided that she must truly be out. This was the perfect opportunity, and she was missing it. She would _not_ be happy about this when she woke up, and from the looks of things he was going to be cuffed to her when that moment occurred. The cool metal snapped in place around his wrist, and he sighed.

Yep.

He gave Renee the name and address of the coffee shop and watched carefully as she left, listening with dread as multiple locks clicked into place behind her. When he knew she was gone, he used his legs to swivel his chair around and with his free hand tenderly cupped Kate's battered face. "Kate?" he whispered, brushing her blood-matted hair away from her cheek, and nuzzled a particularly nasty bruise with his lips. "C'mon, sweetheart. Wake up."

She moaned in protest but she opened her eyes, and he watched as awareness gradually began to give them life. "Did she go get coffee?" she murmured groggily. Looking down at their cuffed hands, she grimaced in irritation.

Rick brought her lips to his and nodded into the comforting kiss. "Yeah – she believed us."

"She believed _you_," Kate corrected, ruefully lifting her hand to swipe at the blood running down her cheek. "She tried to _kill_ me_._"

"About that." As he spoke, he gently massaged Kate's aching neck. "I don't think Kathy Bates is behind the brakes."

"Kathy Bates?"

"Haven't you ever seen Misery? The movie based on the Stephen King novel?"

Kate shook her head, and Castle looked positively horrified. "It's a classic! This deranged fan – played by Kathy Bates in the movie – kidnaps her favorite author and forces him to write a book that brings her favorite character back to life."

"Apparently, I don't have to see it – or read it," Kate joked weakly. "I'm living it."

"Yeah – except she doesn't want me to bring a character back to life," he amended, a sober tone of defeat coating his words. "She wants me to kill one."

"So why don't you think she's behind the car thing?"

"Well – she admitted to being the one that followed us on our date – took the pictures – put them up in your apartment – and conked you over the head with her gun."

"Yeah, she likes doing that."

He smiled sadly. "Yeah." Kissing her temple, he traced a gash on her cheek and winced when she winced.

"You still haven't told me – why don't you think she had anything to do with the brakes?"

"Because that would be too easy. We'd both be dead – and I may be uber-talented but even I can't write from the grave."

The wheels turned in Kate's mind, and she nodded. "So … maybe the brakes were tampered with by John Brennan's killer. The same one that left the note telling us to leave Edith alone and stop asking questions."

"And Renee was simply stalking us, waiting for the perfect chance to kidnap us, and what could be more perfect than our car going over a cliff and stranding us."

"Yes – and for all anyone knows, we died in that explosion." Groaning, she laid her head against Rick's shoulder, neither one caring about the transfer of blood. They quite simply just needed the contact.

"Do you remember how long it took us to get here from Queens?"

Kate thought, her eyes squinting with the effort, before she slowly nodded. "I think about 20 minutes?"

Rick agreed. "So, that means we're not quite in the city. Probably. Unless bat-poop crazy Renee got lucky with traffic."

"Which means it will take her a while to get the coffee and come back," Kate supplied, realizing where he was heading with this train of thought. She swiveled her head around to peer at the desk. "Did she leave the laptop?"

"Yeah – but there's no internet. I already checked. I'm pretty sure we're in a basement or a cellar – somewhere underground. I used the wireless card to search for any unsecured network, but couldn't find one."

"Well, we've got some time to come up with a plan before she gets back," Kate sighed, leaning into his chest for a precious moment before sitting up with resolve. "Let's look around."

Castle eyed their hands – cuffed to each other and secured by Kate's chair – then he looked at his desk chair on wheels and rolled his eyes heavenward. This was going to be interesting.

* * *

><p>Lanie fidgeted anxiously as she waited for her coffee, checking her phone every couple of minutes in hopes of seeing a text from Javier to let her know Kate and Castle were okay. No such luck. After he had called to tell her what Gates had found out about the car explosion in Queens, she had been unable to concentrate on anything remotely resembling work. So, she'd come here – to the coffee shop near the precinct – in an attempt to take her mind off the waiting and calm her nerves. It wasn't working, but it was better than staring at dead bodies, knowing that Kate and Castle might be in someone else's morgue.<p>

She glanced around at the other customers, her gaze landing on a plump brunette who seemed as nervous as Lanie herself was. "Doctor P?" Hearing her name called, the medical examiner gratefully accepted the hot cup from the barista, but her spine stiffened as she heard the order being placed next to her at the counter.

"I'm here to pick up an order for Richard Castle. He told me to get his usual."

"Do you want the usual order for Detective Beckett as well, miss?"

"No," came the instant, almost-growled reply. "_Just_ for Rick."

Lanie surreptitiously examined the young woman under the guise of stirring her coffee and covertly typed out a text to Javier, letting him know what she had just heard. Within seconds, she felt the reply vibrate against her fingers.

**Follow ****her.** **Not ****2 ****close.**

"Who does he think I am?" she muttered under her breath as she kept a close eye on the girl waiting for Castle's coffee. "Quincy?"

But follow her, she did.


	15. Chapter 15

Renee never knew what hit her.

For that matter, Castle wasn't sure _he_ knew what hit her. Just – Kate. Kate, bruised and battered. Kate, cuffed to him with an extremely intrusive chair in between. Kate hit her. To be more specific, Kate swirled and sliced with her legs, a scissor-kick to end all scissor-kicks, knocking Renee's feet out from under her. The coffee went flying, and so did Renee. Some sort of crazy-sexy ninja wrestler move from Kate was next – a move that Castle knew would be the fuel for his fantasies for ages to come.

Together, taking advantage of their captor's unconscious state, they shuffled her prone body toward the large vault that had once been their prison. Tossing her inside with an unceremonious heave, they hefted the steel door until it whirred and locked into place with a very satisfying click. Panting slightly from the exertion, Kate met Rick's eyes and in silent agreement they placed their backs against the vault and slid down the cool metal to the floor. The chair between them, they found each other's fingers and laced them together and turned their heads wearily to exchange a victorious look.

Rick was the first to speak. "Now what?"

* * *

><p>Esposito and Ryan pulled their unmarked car behind Lanie's and unobtrusively disembarked, sauntering casually by her vehicle to stop a few feet ahead outside a small convenience store on the corner. As they knew she would, she also stepped from her car and joined them, feigning interest in a window display.<p>

"She went into that brownstone about 15 minutes ago," Lanie told them, tilting her head in the direction of a rundown townhome across the street. "There seems to be a separate entrance down those stairs on the right – a basement maybe? That's the way she went in."

"Did you follow her?" Esposito hissed, his face reflecting his incredulity at her boldness.

"Yes," Lanie drolled sarcastically, crossing her arms over her chest. "I walked right up to her and asked if she had my friends locked up in her basement." She withered him with a look. "No, Javier. I did _not_ follow her. I watched from the safety of my car."

"Why are you getting all upset with me?" he bristled. "It was an innocent question."

"It was _not_ an innocent question! You think I'm just an airheaded…"

"Guys!" Ryan interjected, clearly frustrated with their bickering. "Can we not do this right now? Beckett and Castle are in danger, and you two can't get past a question that Jenny asked – a truly innocent question, by the way. Espo – did you call for backup?"

"Yeah," Esposito gave his partner a tight nod, his body still coiled for a fight. "They should be here soon."

"Okay," Ryan nodded. "Lanie – you were great, thanks. But it's probably better if you wait in the car for this. It could get ugly. Which is what my oaf of a partner here would say if he weren't so busy posturing for your benefit."

Lanie tried to look offended but couldn't manage to pull it off. "Be careful," she warned the two men, her eyes lingering on Javier with a worried gaze. "Get them out of there."

* * *

><p>"I suppose we could talk about all that stuff we're not talking about yet," Castle offered amicably as he played with Kate's fingers in his own.<p>

"What do you want to know?" Kate asked in resignation.

"What did you really think of our first kiss?"

"Our first kiss? You mean the one where we were trying to save Esposito and Ryan?"

"That's the one."

Their eyes met, and she felt hers soften, much to her consternation. "Well…I – "

As she began to speak, the door burst open and Esposito and Ryan burst in, guns drawn, a bevy of officers at their flanks. "Are you guys okay?"

Kate breathed an audible sigh of relief but squeezed Castle's hand. "We're fine."

"Where are the girl and the coffee?" Esposito asked as he knelt to pry the handcuffs open with a tool one of the officers handed him.

"The coffee's there," Castle nodded toward the spilled puddle near the doorway. "Kathy Bates is in there." His newly freed hand thumbed over his shoulder to the vault.

"Kathy Bates?"

"It's a book-movie thing," Kate supplied, accepting Ryan's offered hand and standing to her feet. "Her name is Renee."

"So she's in the safe?"

Rick and Kate answered in unison, one word of correction that brought smiles to their own faces. "Vault."


	16. Chapter 16

Rick held out the cup of coffee, sharing a secret grin with her as she lifted her hand to accept the hot drink. "Is this your special custom order that saved our hides?" Kate asked, a twinkle in her eyes that nearly stopped his heart.

Laughing, he waggled his eyebrows mysteriously. "I'll never tell." He watched her take a long sip, unable to tear his gaze away from her.

"Sit." She scooted over slightly on the hospital bed, patting the space beside her.

He obeyed and pressed a kiss to her temple while he was at it. Lanie and Rick had both ganged up on Kate and insisted that she go to the ER for her head and face injuries, and the attending physician admitted her overnight for observation. Lacing their fingers together, he traced a faint bruise that darkened her wrist and raised her hand so he could caress the dusky shadow with his lips.

"Best kiss of my life."

Cocking his head to the side, he gazed at her curiously, wondering what she meant. He held her wrist loosely and raised an eyebrow, but she shook her head on a grin. "The kiss that night – at the warehouse – best kiss of my life."

His lips formed a silent '_oh_', his eyes blinked a mute '_really?_' and his grin lit up the otherwise dreary room. "Did you not hear me moan?" Kate asked in disbelief at his surprise.

"Of course I heard you moan – I dream about that moan. I wish I'd been recording your moan with my phone so I could make it my new ringtone for your calls," he countered. "I just thought it was for that goon's benefit – you know, to make it more convincing."

"That's what I hoped you thought," she admitted with a wry grin. "But no, I totally lost myself in that kiss at first." She squeezed his hand. "I'm serious, Castle. Best kiss I've ever had."

"I may have to take that as a challenge," he teased in an easy drawl that dragged a shiver up and down Kate's spine. His face migrated closer until only a millimeter of space remained vacant between them.

"Kiss me, Kate," he murmured teasingly.

"How long have you been waiting to say that?" Her eyes smiled at him, and he couldn't help but stare.

"For pretty much forever," he whispered.

She closed the distance, fusing her lips to his with a gurgled moan that lodged in the back of her throat. Tongue met tongue in a clash of need and want, hands became tangled in hair and hospital linens, and arousal nudged its way into the equation. Rick expertly gave and took in turn, coaxing her surrender and relinquishing control all at the same time. His whole body got involved in the kiss, and Kate wasn't sure at one point if she was still in bed or if she had instead begun floating to the ceiling. She was the first to ease away from the frenzied kiss after long blissful moments, her mouth parting as she fought to stabilize her ragged breaths.

"I stand corrected," she finally managed to rasp in a husky voice. "The warehouse kiss – definitely #2 on the list now." Swiping her tongue along her swollen lips, she watched his eyes darken hungrily and playfully shoved him back to a sitting position. "Let's not make it #3 just yet. We _are_ in a hospital, don't forget."

Running her fingers lightly along his arm, she tilted her head and considered him thoughtfully. "What did _you_ think of the warehouse kiss?" At his curious eye twitch, she flicked his elbow and huffed. "Hey – I'm not the only one that has to talk about this stuff."

His grin was immediate, and he captured her wayward hand, covering it with his and resting them both on his thigh. "The warehouse kiss…" he pretended to consider, dodging another swat from Kate with a relaxed laugh. "Honestly – I forgot it wasn't real."

"It was real," she interrupted softly. "The cover was just an excuse for something we both wanted."

"I quit thinking around the time I decided to go for it," Rick confessed with a sheepish smile. "Best dumb idea I've ever had."

She raised her coffee, touching it to his in a lighthearted toast. "Hear, hear!" Taking a sip, she set it loosely in her lap and asked, "Did your life flash before your eyes in the bank when Trapper John had that gun on you?"

"No." His eyes pierced into her soul, the blue depths swirling with memories and love. When he spoke again, his voice was thick with emotion. "But you and Alexis did. The two people I needed to live for. The two people I loved more than anything else on earth."

Tears threatened, and Kate forced herself to swallow around the lump in her throat. She traced his jaw with a shaky hand and toyed absently with the hair behind his ear as she tried to get out the words she wanted to say. "When I left you in there – taking 'Sal' out on the stretcher – and I turned back to look at you… I wanted to just stare at you as long as possible, memorizing every line, every angle, every shadow." Her voice cracked as she added, "Every tone of blue in your eyes. In case I never saw you alive again."

"I was doing the same thing," he admitted hoarsely. "Whatever happened after that, I wanted your face in my mind when it happened." Catching a tear from her cheek with his forefinger, he smiled sadly. "We've certainly dragged this whole will-they-or-won't-they thing on long enough, haven't we?"

She laughed around her emotion and nodded. "Yeah… I'm glad we settled that with a 'they will'."

"Me too." He kissed her again – powerless to resist the temptation to do so. "Kate…" Inhaling deeply, he waited for her gaze to lift to his and knew the instant she registered what he was about to say. "I know this is quick. I know we've only been dating less than a week. I know this isn't the most romantic setting I could have chosen. I know there are thousands of reasons to say 'no'… but I'm tired of wasting any more time."

Holding her eyes by the sheer power of the love shining from his, he wrapped a tendril of hair around his finger and graced her with a watery smile. "Marry me?"

"Castle –"

His heart dropped. She'd called him 'Castle'. That meant a chastisement was on its way. But, wait a minute… Her arms were around him, her lips grazing his Adam's apple, his chin, his jaw, his nose, his ear, his eyes.

"Rick," she murmured. He could taste the salt of her tears, and he knew he wouldn't be able to breathe again until she answered his question.

"Yes."


	17. Chapter 17

Alexis looked up as the door opened, her eyes following her father as he wearily stepped inside the loft and locked them in again for the evening. She stood and walked into the hug he offered after spying her in the great room.

"I wasn't in any danger," he assured her, his voice muffled, his lips in her hair. "The crazy chick had it in for Kate." He paused a moment. She waited. "Well… okay, maybe I was in danger when the brakes quit working on Kate's car."

"Yeah, I'd say so," she grinned against his chest, hugging him just a little tighter for good measure. "How's Kate?"

"Fine. She was fussing about having to stay overnight in the hospital, but she was asleep when I left." He drew back from the father-daughter embrace and grinned. "The beauty of pain medicine."

"I'm glad she's okay."

He could tell by her eyes that she meant it, and he slipped his arm around her shoulder with a nod toward the couch. "Let's sit. I need to talk to you about something."

When they had situated themselves in comfortable positions, he took one of her hands and toyed with her fingers as he used to do when she was a little girl. "I asked Kate to marry me," he began softly, eyes on her face, searching for her honest reaction.

"Wow." Alexis couldn't hide her surprise, but a pleased smile curved at her lips. "What happened to your decision to date someone for at least 2 years before asking them to marry you?"

Smiling wryly at the reference to a conversation they'd had after his divorce from Gina, he shrugged. "I should have known you'd bring that up."

"You did tell me to hold you to that," she reminded him.

"I did." He nodded, feeling a pout settle over his face like a child who didn't get what they wanted. "But Kate's different…"

"I know," Alexis laughed and shook her head in tolerant fondness at her father. "She is. She's 'the one', isn't she?"

"She is." His face lit up, the love he felt for Kate clearly visible in his features. "I can promise you this – we will never have to have this discussion again. When I marry Kate – it's for life. She's a 'one and done' kind of woman."

"You don't have to look anywhere else once the songs make sense," his daughter remarked with the wisdom of a sage. "Third time's the charm, right Dad?"

"I guess so." His smile mirrored hers, and he squeezed her hand. "So… you're okay with Kate?"

"Are you kidding? She's perfect for you, Dad. And she really, really loves you. I can see it in her face every time you two are together." Alexis pursed her lips and tilted her head to the side. "Did she say yes?"

"Yes," Rick beamed, then winced as he added, "With conditions."

"Conditions?"

"Yes… apparently my reputation of rushing into marriage has preceded me." Regret resonated across his eyes, but he managed a tired smile for his daughter. "We're setting the wedding date for next year – a fall wedding. Almost a whole year from now." He could hear the whine in his own voice. "And in the meantime, we have to go to … _counseling_."

Alexis laughed as her dad shuddered, clearly not on board with the whole counseling part of their engagement. "I think it's a good idea, Dad," she sided with Kate, patting his arm when he grudgingly acknowledged that she might be right. "You two are going to have stuff to work through that most couples don't have – you've almost seen each other die more times than should be allowed. You work together in a very high-stress job. God knows you both have issues that would completely warp a normal human being – deep crap that would cause all kinds of problems in your marriage if you didn't talk about it early on. You know?"

He stared at her – part of him seeing the beautiful young woman sitting next to him, part of him seeing a little girl with red pigtails and buck teeth. Reaching out, he stroked the hair that pooled on her shoulder and tucked a few locks behind her ear. "When did you get so grown up?"

She smiled and folded herself into his arms. "I'm still your little girl, Dad."

Kissing the top of her head, he swallowed the fatherly emotion welling up in his heart and said the first thing that came to mind. "Wanna play some laser tag?"

* * *

><p>Kate stirred restlessly, feeling the need to swim through the morphine haze and break the surface into reality. There was something wrong. She could sense it, even in her drugged subconscious. Images plagued her dreams – a slit throat, an empty vault, a cut brake line, an explosion. A moan escaped her lips, and she fought to regain a wakeful state.<p>

The call button for the nurse – where was that?

Her body still under the influence of pain medication and exhaustion, Kate struggled to open her eyes, crying out in frustration when she had no success. Her hand twitched at her side, and she forced her brain to order her fingers to grope along the bedsheets in search of the clicker that would summon some sort of help.

Why couldn't she wake up?

Was Castle still here? "Rick?" she heard herself murmur, her throat dry and too soft to be heard. No… somewhere in the back of her mind, she remembered him leaving. Recalled the tender kiss he'd brushed against her lips.

She needed a nurse. She needed the button.

A hand closed over hers, halting her search, and unexplained fear clutched at her senses. Every fighting instinct that had ever been ingrained in her rallied within her tired frame, and she felt a brief thrill of victory as her eyes slowly – ever so slowly – opened. At first, she could only manage a barely-there slit. In a few seconds, she found the strength to flex the muscles in her eyelids and used sheer willpower to keep them open. As a dimmed light flooded her awareness, a shadow gradually came into focus.

A shadow with beady eyes. A shadow with beady eyes in an orderly uniform. A shadow doing something with her morphine drip bag.

She felt her throat begin to close, felt her limbs start to stiffen – whether from panic or something more sinister, she couldn't be sure. The shadow whispered through the growing fog, his voice low and menacing, "I told you to leave her alone." In the next instant, he had disappeared, fading into the darkness and releasing her hand.

She didn't have much time. She knew. Memories played in her mind – memories of lying in the grass, bleeding out, life leaving her as Castle cradled her in his arms. But he wasn't here now. He couldn't help her tonight.

The nurse. Her fingers fumbled for purchase, finding nothing but coarse linens.

Where was the call button?

* * *

><p><em><strong>Oh - did you think it was safe now? Oops :P (Reviews do make me write faster ... just sayin')<strong>_


	18. Chapter 18

_**Thank you all so much for reading and commenting and following this story. You make it easy to keep writing! ~Carrie :-)**_

* * *

><p>Clarity slowly settled in Kate's brain, and she opened her eyes with a tentative blink. His smile was the first thing she saw, his kiss the first touch that entered her renewed awareness. "Hi," she whispered and winced at how raw her voice sounded – and felt.<p>

"Welcome back," Rick murmured, stroking some wayward hair behind her ear. "I really wish you wouldn't do things like this. It takes at least 5 years off my life each time."

"Yeah, and we all know you have less to work with than the rest of us," Ryan quipped from his place in the corner, causing Kate to turn her head and take in the other occupants of the room's small space.

"Take pity on him," Esposito agreed with a wink. "He can't afford to lose any more years."

"Hey," Kate offered, a small grin tipping the corners of her lips wryly. "If I had a choice, I would be home right now – in my own bed, safe and sound. No psycho fans that hold me captive. No whacked-out orderlies that put God-knows-what in my IV line."

"You would pick your bed over mine?" It figured he would focus on the innocuous choice of vocabulary.

Rolling her eyes at the teasingly-wounded pout to his face, she breathed a slightly abashed, "Castle…Not in front of the kids."

She glared briefly at the two detectives as they snickered childishly, then returned her softening gaze to Rick's twinkling smirk. "I didn't say I wanted to be _alone_ in my bed," she pointed out quietly, her voice barely loud enough to carry to his ears.

Desire darkened the blue that stared back at her, and she bit her lip to hide the smile that wanted to dominate her face. She was quiet for a moment or two, reviewing the previous events in her mind. Cocking her head with a puzzled frown, she said at a normal volume, "What _did_ that orderly do to me tonight, by the way? My memory is a little … fuzzy."

"I'm not surprised," Rick answered with a droll arch to one eyebrow. "Edith's beady-eyed orderly put enough happy juice in your IV to send a herd of elephants to the great beyond on a pink fluffy cloud." He covered her hand, needing the connection. "And for the record – it happened yesterday. You've been out for quite a few hours."

He tweaked her chin when she shot him an embarrassed grin. "The officer that the boys and I decided to have posted outside your room had conveniently gone to the nurses' station for a cup of coffee. Fortunately for all of us, he returned just as our perp was sneaking out of your room."

"Officer Grimes detained him and alerted the nurses that you might have been harmed. They got there just in time – flushed out your system – Doc says you're going to be fine," Esposito continued the story, coming close enough to the bed to squeeze her toes over the blanket that covered them.

"So…" Kate ran her free hand (the one not currently being caressed very distractedly by Castle's thumb) through her hair, mussing it even further. "This guy..."

"Arnold Douglas."

She nodded at Ryan's interjection. "Okay. This Arnold Douglas creep was the one who rigged my brakes?"

"Yep." Castle shifted a bit in the uncomfortable chair, bringing their clasped hands to rest on his knee. "He was the one who primarily took care of Edith in the nursing home. Apparently, she had two time periods that she was trapped in because of the Alzheimer's. She alternated between the two – we always seemed to get the 8-year-old. She also frequently thought she was a young bride and spent a lot of time telling Arnold about the gold bars and stock certificates that her family had given them as wedding gifts."

"He found out that she'd transferred them to her son's name before she went into the nursing home – so those funds couldn't be taken by the state to pay for her care. Did a bit more digging – learned about the vault. I'm sure you can figure the rest out."

Kate dipped her head to acknowledge Ryan's assumption and looked between the three men. "So he's in custody?"

"In custody. Arraignment went on while you indulged in your beauty sleep," Esposito teased her, his dimples prominent as he grinned. "Being held without bail for two counts of attempted murder of a police detective, multiple counts of theft and larceny and, of course, the murder of John Brennan."

Breathing a sigh of relief, Kate asked the next burning question at the top of her list. "When can I get out of here?"

* * *

><p>"I see you've been getting distracted again," Kate joked as she made her way gingerly through the great room, leaning on Castle's arm to support her wobblier-than-she-wanted-to-admit legs.<p>

Rick chuckled bashfully, his gaze taking in the hastily discarded laser tag gear from the night before. "Yeah, well, Alexis and I were having some father-daughter bonding time when Espo called to tell me what had happened to you. Needless to say, putting the gear away was the least of my concerns at the time."

He found a seat on the sofa, tugging her gently onto his lap, folding her into his arms and tracing a line of kisses from her temple to her jaw. "I love you."

Smiling, she leaned into his embrace and tilted her face to offer her lips for a more satisfying kiss. He obliged. "I love you, too," she murmured when he gentled his embrace.

"Did you ever think we'd end up like this?" he asked against her hair.

"Mmmm." She snuggled deeper, taking his arm and wrapping it more tightly around her waist. "I think – somewhere inside – I knew we'd wind up here. Eventually."

"I hoped we would. Since the second I kissed your cheek on our first case," he admitted. "You remember – right before you arrested me. I wanted to make a habit of it."

Kate laughed quietly. "Getting arrested?"

"By you – heck, why not?" He stole her eye roll by nibbling lightly on her ear lobe. "But I meant kissing you."

Drawing a deep breath, he continued with a voice that had gone husky with depth. "I knew for sure that day in the bank – that smile you gave me, before my Mother interrupted. I knew. Whether you knew it or not. That was the smile of a woman in love."

"It was," she agreed. "I almost kissed you then."

"I knew it!" he exclaimed triumphantly, jostling her in jest and eliciting an eruption of giggles by loudly blowing raspberries against Kate's neck.

When she'd recovered from the assault, she laughingly twisted in his arms and let her hands come to rest against his shoulders. "I think I'm ready for bed."

His eyebrows lifted in surprise, then concern. "Really? You… you slept for like 12 hours straight. How can you possibly still need sleep?"

Her smirk sent blood rushing south of the border, and he found himself struck speechless by the lust that flashed in her gaze. His mouth dry, he swallowed as she wriggled into a more 'comfortable' position on his lap, her lips a breath away from his.

"Who said anything about sleep?" she purred, the sultry undertone in her voice rendering him incapable of any thoughts but one. As he lifted her in his arms and made a hasty beeline for the bedroom, she curled her face into his chest and smiled. This was what she'd been waiting for – even long before she could identify the need. Love. Home. Passion. Friendship. Forever.

Her 9-year-old on a sugar rush had turned into the man of her dreams – maybe he always had been. In either case, she knew she would never feel that emptiness in her soul again. She was loved. She was whole. She was happy. She was free.

She was _safe_.

* * *

><p><em>fin.<em>


End file.
